“Hey, wait a—”
The cashier takes my card and hands me the receipt.
“Your food will be ready at the window,” the disenchanted cashier says as I nudge Hudson to move.
“You didn’t have to do that,” he says, sounding guilty for some reason.
I wave him off.
“It’s all good,” I say with a smile. “You can pay me back later.”
Hudson purses his lips as if he’s going to protest, but before he can, the attendant calls out his combo as Alex screams our names to show us where they found a spot big enough to fit all of us.
“I’m going to grab my disgusting sushi burrito and side of worms,” I tease him. “Save a seat for me, okay?”
And with that, I leave Hudson in my dust.
Chapter Four
Hudson
I can’t remember the last time I was in a crowd of this many people. It had to have been some time in college. Back when I played football and would be at games. It used to be so easy… at least, I thought it was at the time. I hadn’t realized the toll it was taking on me. All the social stuff was a lot, and I’d gotten so used to being run down that it became normal.
After college, I discovered that the exhaustion I felt wasn’t just from the alcohol and lack of sleep. It was mental exhaustion from masking all day to fit in.
I’d promised myself I wouldn’t do that anymore. That it wasn’t worth it. That there’s no reason to do that to myself.
Yet, here I am.
In a loud ass place with hundreds of people talking and laughing. It feels like nails on a chalkboard, but I try my hardest to focus on the conversation the guys are having. Something about relationships and dating. Alex says something about being with someone but fucking it up. No surprise there. He never was the settle down type of guy, and I can’t believe he even attempted it.
I nod along, answering when they speak to me, but everything is foggy. I feel like a robot, my mind already exhausted from forcing myself to not freak the fuck out over how overwhelming all of this is.
How do people do this?
How didIdo this?
A wave of relief hits me when everyone decides it’s time to go. There are plans for lunch before the opening tomorrow, which I agree to, but I can’t be sure I’ll actually go. This was all too much, and though tomorrow won’t be like this, it’s still a lot.
But I can do this. It’s only two more days.
We make our way outside, say our goodbyes, and I’m looking left to right to recall which way I came from, when Trey is in my vision, smiling at me.
I can’t help but smile back.
“You okay?” I ask.
“Yeah, I’m good. Areyouokay?”
I run my hand through my hair. “Fine.”
“Don’t lie to me, Huds. Something is going on.”
I stare at him, unsure what to say. Am I that obvious? Do I suck this badly at pretending to be okay these days? Fuck.
“I’m just tired, Trey,” I say, rubbing the back of my neck. “It’s been a long day, and it was loud as fuck in there.”
“Yeah,” he says carefully. “It was pretty fucking loud. And the guys don’t help.” He rolls his eyes. “Like a bunch of damn animals.”
