“Thatcher, you’re hardly a philanderer like your father,” she said in an almost mocking tone. “Do you realize how many men cheat? It’s no big deal.”
I frowned at her. “No big deal? He had those condoms in there for whatever woman he was fucking instead of being home with us.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “So, don’t use a condom. I didn’t want you to anyway. I wanted to feel all of you.” She lifted her hands over her head and wriggled seductively. “Besides, I’m on birth control.”
My eyes narrowed at her. There was something in her tone that made me think she might be lying. I was probably just being paranoid, but it took me right back to a conversation Dad had with Bryce and me about always wearing a condom no matter what the girl said.
He’d said, “Boys, we’re Caldwells. Any woman we got pregnant would own us for eighteen years. There are some that will see you as nothing but a big pile of money with a dick. Be careful out there.” Then he’d handed us each enough condomsto last a decade and asked if we wanted to go to his gentleman’s club to lose our virginity.
We’d both turned him down.
God, my dad was gross. He’d had a point, though, about the women trying to have a baby with us. More than once a woman had tried to convince me to fuck her without a condom. The only woman I’d ever slept with without a condom was Carrie. I sure as hell wasn’t doing it with anyone else.
“Yeah, this isn’t going to happen. I can’t have sex with you unless I’m divorced. I’m not doing that to my wife.”
I pulled on some gray sweatpants I had in one of the bureau drawers and sat on the edge of the bed, my back to her. I was freaking out.
She must’ve been able to tell, because she quit pushing for me to sleep with her.
I held my head in my hands and pictured my mom’s face as night after night for almost their entire marriage she’d waited on my dad to come home. We all had. When I’d been young, I hadn’t understood anything except that Daddy wasn’t home and my mommy was sad. As a teenager, I’d figured it out.
He’d been fucking some woman while my mom took extra anxiety medicine or drank a bottle of wine to get through the evenings. No one had come to my swim meets or tennis matches. Dad had cared more about sex than his kids. Mom had drowned her sorrows in prescription drugs or alcohol instead of letting her four kids’ activities take her mind off things for a while.
I’d gone to college close to home to make damn sure to be at Bryce and Celia’s extracurricular activities. Even though Mom had actually shown up for Olive’s, I’d gone, too. Olive had participated in beauty pageants, and Mom had enjoyed those. But Bryce’s rugby matches? Celia’s debate team or scholars’ bowl tournaments? It was just me.
Now, I just wanted to get away from Madison and go home. I couldn’t be around her right now.
But then I started thinking of all our history together. We were high school sweethearts. We’d stayed together all through college. We’d gotten an apartment together. She’d cried when I asked her to marry me. I had been completely convinced we were meant to be together.
After she’d broken things off with me, I’d pined for her in the back of my mind for years. I was pretty sure there was a part of me that never fully committed to Carrie. I’d always held something back.
After all of that, I owed Madison and myself a real chance to be a couple again, didn’t I?
I was barely paying attention when she started asking me random questions.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Carrie
I’d never been to Thatcher’s office so late at night. And certainly not in a ball gown. I wasn’t really sure what to expect, but the security guards didn’t even blink when they saw me.
“Mrs. Caldwell, how are you tonight?”
“Just fine,” I answered breathlessly. I’d jogged across the parking lot as fast as I dared in my heels. “I’m looking for Thatcher… er, Mr. Caldwell. Do you have any idea if he’s still here?”
They typed something and stared at their computer screen. “He never signed out, so he’s probably still in his office. Burning the midnight oil, huh?” he laughed, but he sounded nervous. “Let me just call up to let him know you’re here.” He reached for a phone.
“No!” I said it too loudly and it echoed in the cavernous lobby. I’d never seen it so empty. It was normally full of people and bursting with chatter. Not now, though. “Sorry,” I said. “It’s just that I’d like to surprise him.”
The security guard’s smile was strained. “I’m not sure he likes surprises…”
“Oh, we missed our anniversary last week,” I lied. “I’m meeting him here to go out and celebrate.” I indicated my beautiful dress and hoped he wouldn’t ask why we were going out so late.
“Gotcha. Okay, go on up. I won’t ring him to let him know you’re coming.”
I could tell he didn’t believe me, so I gave him an extra bright smile as I got in the elevator.
I nervously tapped my foot on the way to the top floor. I feared what I was going to find.
