She wasn’t going to give that up for anything, not even if all ten of her toes were broken, and she’d left a trail of bloody footprints on Lord and Lady Hayhurst’s pristine ballroom floor.
Not for anything, or anyone, not even Lachlan. He might think her too weak to fight her way to the end of her season. He might not believe in her anymore, but she was no longer that same lady she’d been just a week ago. There was no going back. Not now. Not ever.
Now, nothing in the world mattered as much to her as proving him wrong.
Proving them all wrong.
Shecouldmake it through her season. Shewouldmake it, despite Lady Joanna’s attacks and Lord Chester’s pumps and theton’s gossip and smirking.
Because if she didn’t…if she didn’t…
Where would it end? Where wouldsheend? In her grandmother’s townhouse, wandering from room to room, her footsteps echoing in the emptiness. In Brighton with the other invalids, her grandmother hovering over her, fearing the worst each time she coughed, or showed even the slightest hint of low spirits.
No. There had to be more than that. She needed more, and she deserved more, and if she was the only one left who believed she could have it, well…
Then so be it. She met Lachlan’s eyes, and slowly shook her head. “No. I’m not giving up. I promised I’d finish the season with Isla, and that’s what I intend to do. You said…just last week you urged me to stand up for myself. You said no one could make me a victim without my consent. Was that just talk, Lachlan? Because nothing’s changed since then.”
His face darkened. “Everything’s changed! Tonight it wasn’t just a few snide words from Lady Joanna. They’vehurtyou, and I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t protect you from it.”
“You think this isyourfault?” Hyacinth gaped at him, stunned. For the first time she noticed the bleakness in his face, the way his hand shook as he dragged it through his hair.
He didn’t see this as her failing. He saw it ashis.
“Lachlan.” She reached for his hand and held it between her own. “There was no way you could have known this would happen. EvenIdidn’t know poor Lord Chester was such a danger on the dance floor, and he and I have been friends for several years. You’ve been in London for less than three weeks. How could you possibly know?”
“I knew something was wrong. Lady Joanna was giddy at the thought of you dancing with Lord Chester, and so was that half-wit, Miss Tilbury. I should have seen it, and put a stop to it before—”
“How could you have put a stop to it, Lachlan, without causing a scene and making it worse? Would you have chased poor Lord Chester out of the ballroom when he stepped on my foot? Thrown me over your shoulder and carried me off the floor?” She squeezed his hand, and offered him a cautious smile. “At one point I thought you might do just that, and I’m very glad you didn’t. There’s quite enough gossip about me already.”
She’d hoped for a smile in return, but his lips remained tight. “I should have warned you something was wrong before he led you out to the floor.”
“Even if you had warned me, it wouldn’t have done any good.” She released his hand and fell back against the sofa with a sigh. “As I said, I’ve known Lord Chester for several years. Even if I’d known he’d step on my toes, I wouldn’t have refused to dance with him.”
“Damn it, Hyacinth.” The bleakness on his face dissolved into anger. “Is that your idea of standing up for yourself? Letting some gawky, tongue-tied lord crush you under his feet?”
Hyacinth flinched at his ugly words. She didn’t answer right away, but watched him in silence for a long moment. “No,” she whispered at last. “That’s what I call being a friend.”
A harsh sound tore from his throat. “A man who’d let Lady Joanna coax him into trampling you isn’t your friend.”
“He didn’t set out to hurt me, Lachlan. He wouldn’t. I don’t know what happened with Lady Joanna, but I know Lord Chester. He wouldn’t do that.”
“Hediddo it!” He yanked the hem of her skirt back to reveal her slippers, but the anger on his face transformed into horror when he saw the blood seeping through the white satin covering her toes. “Hyacinth…oh, God, look what he did to you.”
His voice broke on the last word, and Hyacinth jerked her skirts down over her slippers to hide them, then pulled her knees up and wrapped her arms around them to keep them hidden. “Listen to me, Lachlan. Lady Joanna is…”
But she hadn’t any words for Lady Joanna. That kind of vindictiveness was wholly outside her experience. She didn’t understand it, and she didn’t want to. “Lady Joanna is one thing, but Lord Chester…”
Oh, how to make him understand?
She drew in a deep breath. “Lord Chester was one of the first gentlemen I met when I arrived in London. His grandmother, Lady Dale, is friends with my grandmother, and a dear, sweet lady. I was just sixteen when I came to live with my grandmother, and a hopeless, bumbling country girl. My parents had died the year before, you see, and I’d never been to London. I was…quite lost.”
She peeked at him through her lashes, half-afraid he’d be glowering at her, or worse, yawning with boredom, but he was watching her face with such attentive intensity, heat washed over her cheeks.
“Lady Dale used to bring Lord Chester with her when she came to visit my grandmother, and he was…oh, he was the kindest young man. Awkward, to be sure, and shy, but then so was I. Still, between the two of us we somehow managed to put our self-consciousness aside, and we became friends. I told him all about the life I’d left behind in Surrey, and he confided in me about his father’s illness. Sometimes we’d walk in the gardens, and he’d give me the scientific names for all the plants. He’s fond of botany, and has a great deal of knowledge about it, and—”
“He’s your friend. I understand that. But that doesn’t mean you have to let him hurt you, whether he meant to or not. You should have let me escort you off the dance floor.”
She shook her head. Lachlan said he understood, but he didn’t. Not really. “If I’d let you escort me off the dance floor, and we’d left Lord Chester there alone, in the middle of a set, how do you think he’d have felt, Lachlan?”
