It’s a good thing if you have. You’re engaged to someone else. It’s better for everyone if Dom doesn’t want you.
That was all true. So why the fuck was I praying Xander was about to tell me something different?
Xander’s laughter faded away as he scrutinised me. “Why are you upset?”
“I’m not,” I said curtly.
“You are.” Xander thought for a moment before breaking into a smile. “Wait, did you seriously think I meant you can’t encourage Dominic to have feelings for you because that’ll never happen?”
“Doesn’t matter what I think.” I turned back to lift the lid off the pot and busy myself stirring it. Anything to avoid the pity I’d spotted shining in my friend’s eyes. “I’m getting married to Kate. I don’t care what Dom thinks or feels.”
“Ryan,” Xander said softly, “why are you lying?”
I stirred harder. How could I answer him when I didn’t know the reason myself?
“Stop that,” he said, grabbing my wrist loosely. “The heat’s not even on, for fuck’s sake.”
I slammed the spoon onto the side, splattering sauce everywhere. “Whatdidyou mean, then?”
Xander tutted, picking up the spoon and wiping up the mess with a cloth. Dominic wasn’t the only one who’d been changed by the service with regards to cleanliness. “I meant that it doesn’t matter what you do—it’s not going to influence Dominic’s feelings. That man is desperately inlove with you. Whether you take him curry or not isn’t going to change that.”
I sucked in a breath. “You can’t know that. You’ve literally met him once.”
“And that was all I needed to confirm what I already suspected.” Xander rinsed out the cloth and hung it over the tap. “He’s literally inserted himself into your life in every way possible.”
“That doesn’t mean it’s love.”
Dom’s words from my engagement party came back to me.“What I am is in love.”
I didn’t believe it hearing it from him anymore than I did Xander.
“Yes, it does.” Xander leaned against the sink with his back to me. I frowned at the tight lines of his shoulders. “Dominic and I are more alike than I realised. If I was in love, I’d behave exactly the same as him. I’d play as dirty as I could if it gave me a shot at winning the person I loved back.”
I stepped closer, reaching out to touch his shoulder. “Xan?”
He jerked suddenly, whipping around to give me a rueful smile. “Ignore me. I’m just talking shit as usual.”
“No, I don’t think you are,” I said slowly, my eyes flitting between his. “What is it? What aren’t you telling me?”
He flinched before pasting on a smile. “Nothing. It doesn’t matter now.”
Before I could point out the obvious—that it clearly did matter if it was upsetting him—Xander was disappearing out of the kitchen. When he came back, he was wearing his coat and boots. “Two things before I go.”
I shot him a glare. “Before you abandon me, you mean.”
Xander chuckled. “Whatever. Number one—you don’tneed to worry about how Dominic feels. You told me in the car earlier that he said he’s still in love with you. Maybe you should try taking him at his word.”
“Easier said than done,” I muttered before remembering the real reason I should be protesting. “Besides, I have Kate. I don’t care how Dominic’s feeling.”
“Which brings me neatly to point two. You care even if you don’t want to. And, because of that, you need to go and see him before you tear yourself apart with worry.”
I eyed him warily. “What do you mean?”
“Please.” Xander rolled his eyes. “You’ve been checking your phone every few minutes since he told you he went to Frank’s.”
“I never told you he did that.”
“Read it over your shoulder.” He smirked in response to the glare I threw at him. “It’s killing you not knowing how it went. Go over and find out. He’s home. I heard him get back an hour ago.”
