“I will be here for you, okay? Whatever you need, baby.”
“Mom.” I pushed her away. “Tell. Me.”
She stood up and with every passing second, my heart drummed faster, terrified of what was going to come out of her mouth.
Pacing the length of the dining room, from one side to the other, she turned to me suddenly, and I knew she was finally going to tell me what was wrong. Christine Kincaid was not a weak woman. She practically raised me by herself after my father decided that having a family was too much work.
She overcame the death of my younger brother and kept going forward. It took her a while to forget an awful night when their car went over the bridge, but she made it. Yet, seeing her like this scared the living crap out of me.
Pulling me up, I only then realized how petite she was, and how tall I was. With her hands wrapped tightly around mine, she sniffled before she connected her eyes with mine.
“It’s Sophie, darling.” What? “I want you to know that no matter what, we’ll get through this together.”
“What about Sophie, Mom?” My voice shook, my palms started getting sweaty. “What happened to Sophie?”
“Oh God.” She placed her hand over her mouth, those tears free falling now.
“Mom.” I took her by her shoulders, almost shaking her.
“You don’t know, do you?”
“Know what?”
A heartbeat, two or three, maybe even a minute passed, until she said what I never imagined she was going to say.
“Sophie has cancer, Noah.”No. No. NO. “She’s dying, baby.”
Her face blurred in front of me. Before I could understand what was happening, I was falling on my knees, chanting to myself as if that could change what she just said.
“No, no, no—”
“I’m so sorry, darling. I know how much you—”
“That’s not true,” I denied. “That can’t be true.”
Hot, angry tears rolled down my cheeks, connecting with my lips. My lips that not so long ago were devouring hers.
“It’s true. I spoke with her mom a couple of hours ago. She’s in Boston Memorial Hospital right now. She fell during the competition.”
No. I should’ve been there. I should’ve been with her.
She couldn’t be dying. She couldn’t be leaving me.
We were going to grow old together. We were going to see the world together.
She was going to wear a white dress a few years from now, walking toward me down the aisle. She was going to have a round belly filled with our kids, while her eyes sparkled with joy. She was going to be my whole world.
How could my mom tell me that everything I envisioned was going to be just a foolish dream?
I was going to take her to Paris one day, and I was going to drop down on one knee right in front of the Eiffel Tower. She was going to say yes, because she loved me just as much as I loved her.
We were going to go to the same university. We were going to stay together forever.
Why? Fucking why was life this cruel?
“I don’t believe you.” My voice broke, my chest constricting, “I don’t believe you!” I roared, planting my hands on the floor, letting the tears fall.
“Oh, Noah.” My mom bent down and hugged me from above, but her touch was not the one I wanted right now.
