We hadn’t spoken since the doctor’s appointment, and he hadn’t seen me since because every time he came to Saint and Zahra’s, I stayed in my room on purpose.
I blew a heavy breath and tore the door open. I looked at him and let all my annoyance show. “Why are you at my house?”
He stepped further in, looking around my place like he was taking inventory.
The harmony I previously felt in my home was gone, and now I felt like I was standing in a war zone. He looked too damn good for me to literally hate his presence. A fitted cap rode low over his eyes, shadowing that hard expression of his just enough to make him look even more like trouble. His hoodie fit his broad frame right, and his jeans hugged him just enough to show off his thick legs. The Timbs only added to it, making him look sexy in that rough, street way that always got under my skin. Everything about him looked too sexy and so unfair. I hated that my body still did that weak, traitorous shit around him when my mind was already telling me to be disgusted and shut the door in his face.
I turned away from him in frustration and walked back into the apartment without inviting him in. I heard him shut the door and follow me down the hall toward the nursery.
The second he stepped into the room, his eyes went straight to the parts spread across the floor.
I had the box open, screws in little piles, one side panel already put together, and the mattress frame leaning against the wall.
“What are you doing?” he asked.
I looked at him and crossed my arms. “Obviously, I’m putting the crib together.”
“By yourself?”
“Yes.”
His jaw tightened. “Why would you do this alone?”
That question irritated me instantly. “Because it needs to get done.”
I had enough money to pay somebody to put the furniture together, but I was on this kick of teaching myself independence, so I wanted to do it myself.
He stepped farther into the nursery, looking from me to the crib pieces like I had lost my mind. “You don’t need to be building furniture while you’re pregnant.”
I let out a wry laugh. “I’m pregnant, Reek, not handicapped.”
“That’s not the point.”
“Then whatisthe point?” I shot back. “Because from where I’m standing, this is real interesting coming from the man who doesn’t even want me to be pregnant at all.” I could see his anger rising, but I was already heated, so I kept going. “You don’t get to show up and start barking orders. I’m sick of your inconsistency. I’m sick of your mixed signals. I’m sick of you caring one minute and acting like this baby ruined your life the next. You don’t get to keep swinging back and forth whenever it’s convenient for you. I’m the one carrying this baby. I’m the one having to live with every word you say. So, if I need a crib built, I’m going to build the fucking crib. You don’t get to talk down to me, pop up whenever you feel like it, and then police what I do in my own home.”
His eyes got harder. “I’m not policing you. I’m saying stop doing shit you don’t need to be doing while you’re pregnant.”
“And who exactly is supposed to do it? My baby's father, who made it clear he doesn’t want anything to do with this pregnancy?”
He angrily bit his bottom lip. “You always gotta do that? Throw little shots like my initial feelings wasn’t valid. What the fuck did you expect me to say when you came back from Thailand, after not saying a word to me for four fucking months and told me you were pregnant?!”
“You know what, Reek? I expected you to respond exactly how you did. But what I did not expect was for you to torture me with your inconsistency. You clearly care about me, because you had security on me in Thailand, and you’re standing in my condo, despite me never even telling you the address. But instead of dealing with your trauma like a grown man, you keep acting like a moody child and taking it out on me.”
He came toward me fast enough to make my heart skip a beat. “What the fuck you know about my trauma?”
“Enough to know you use it as an excuse,” I hissed.
His nostrils flared. “You talk real big for somebody whose running from her own shit.”
“And you talk real reckless for somebody who keeps wanting the woman you swear trapped you.”
The silence after that was suffocating and hot.
His eyes dropped to my mouth, and mine dropped to his before I could stop them. I hated that the same man making this pregnancy harder than it had to be, was still the one man my body knew too well.
He stepped closer, close enough that I smelled him, that I felt that old tug trying to drag me right back into something I had promised myself was over.
His hand lifted like he was about to touch me, and I already knew where this was going. He was angry. I was angry. But we were both still attracted to each other in ways that made no sense anymore.
