"My first Dom—not Damien, someone before him—was into brat-taming. You know what that is?"
I shook my head.
"It's when the submissive is deliberately defiant. Mouthy. Pushesback against orders just to get a reaction." She wrinkled her nose. "The Dom gets off on the challenge. On breaking through the resistance and forcing the submission."
"That sounds..." I frowned, trying to picture it. "Exhausting."
"It is. For some people, that tension is the whole point. The fight is foreplay." She shrugged. "But that's not me. I hated it. Every time he wanted me to argue, to resist, to make him work for it—I just felt tired. Wrong. Like I was wearing someone else's skin."
She set her mug down, fingers curling around her knee.
"I don't want to fight, Emma. It isn't in my personality. I want peace. Calm. I want to know exactly what's expected of me and then do it perfectly." A soft smile. "I want to serve—not because someone forced me to, but because it brings me joy. Because making Todd's life easier makes my life feel meaningful."
She met my gaze, and there was no shame there. No apology.
"It took me years to figure that out. To stop trying to be the submissive I thought I was supposed to be and just... be myself."
"And what about you and…" I trailed off, dropping my attention to the cup in my hands.
The question felt dangerous somehow. Like I was peeking into a room I wasn't sure I was allowed to enter.
"Me and Damien?" her brows quirked. "Almost as bad, but in completely different ways."
Vivian tilted her head, considering. Her gaze drifted toward the far wall where Damien and Todd were still talking, their conversation punctuated by occasional laughter.
"Damien is..." She paused, searching for words. "He's a protector. A provider. But not in the way Todd is with me." Her fingers tapped absently against her knee. "He doesn't want someone who needs him to function. He wants someone who functions brilliantly on their own—and then chooses to let him in anyway."
She turned back to me, recognition in her expression.
"He needs to earn a submissive's surrender. Not in a brat-tamer way—not through force or resistance—but through his own service."
My expression twisted in confusion.
She laughed softly. "I know it sounds strange. But that doesn't make him a submissive. He's still very much a Dominant." She tapped a finger against her mug, thinking. "He finds happiness in watching his submissive succeed. Thrive. He wants to be the reason she stands taller, not the reason she shrinks."
"He doesn't want a doormat, Emma. He wants a queen who chooses to kneel."
Her gaze drifted toward the armchairs where Damien sat, fondness flickering in her expression.
The words settled over me, weight and warmth at once.
A queen who chooses to kneel. Is that what I was to him? Is that what he saw when he looked at me?
I turned the phrase over in my mind. One word kept snagging—catching like a splinter.
"Protocols," I said slowly. "You mentioned protocols. What does that mean?"
Vivian's eyebrows lifted slightly, as if surprised by the question. Then she nodded, settling deeper into her chair.
"Protocols are… rules, I guess. Rituals. The agreed-upon structure of how a dynamic operates. It's different for every couple," she continued. "For Todd and me, it's things like how I serve his tea, how I greet him when he comes home, how I ask permission before spending money." She smiled. "Some people have protocols around speech—certain words they use, ways of addressing their Dominant. Others have them around behavior, dress, even sleep schedules."
"And you had them with Damien?"
"Some." She shrugged. "Nothing as elaborate as what Todd and I have now. But there were expectations. Ways I knelt. How I presentedmyself before a scene." Her gaze flickered with memory. "Small things that reminded us both of our roles."
"Damien and I don't really have… those. At least not yet. He mentioned rules, but with everything that happened…"
Vivian's smile softened. "That makes sense. You two have probably been surviving more than settling." She flipped a strand of ruby hair over her shoulder. "Honestly, it was probably the best call, especially with you being new."
