Reid nodded and headed for the stairs. In the bedroom, he gently settled Ella on the bed and peered down at the little face for longer than was good for him. He shook his head and left the room. At the stairs, he spied Megan in the kitchen. She was reading the box for a brownie mix and humming. He joined her.
The longing returned. Full force. If Megan and Ella didn’t go home today, he would have an extremely hard time resisting these feelings. He had no idea yet if he could make a long-term commitment to this woman and her child. Not while Ella was so ill. If push came to shove, he feared he would have no choice but to walk out on her, and he’d never be able to live with being that kind of man.
Megan put dinner rolls into the oven and set the timer. They still hadn’t gotten a positive ID on Fowler, so Reid asked her to stay put. She’d wanted to leave with Jack and Lauren, but it wasn’t a good idea to take Ella out on snow-covered roads where they could slip into a ditch and become stranded. With as fast as the snow was piling up, she didn’t mind remaining here for the night. And with Fowler dead, she could enjoy being in this wooded wonderland with snow all around.
An overwhelming feeling of happiness and contentment took hold of her, and she couldn’t help but smile. But then it disappeared as fast as it came. She hadn’t wished Fowler dead and shouldn’t take joy in his passing. But she could be joyful in having their problem eliminated.
A sense of hope was trying to rise to the surface for once. Especially with seeing Ella coloring in a Christmas coloring book at the island and Reid sitting at the dining table with his computer. So homey. So comfortable.
So wrong.
No matter how ideal this setting was, once they went home in the morning when the roads were safe to travel, Reid would be out of their lives for good.
“Can I have a brownie now?” Ella asked.
Happy to have her daughter asking for food of any kind, Megan smiled at her. But she still couldn’t give her sweets in place of dinner, which would be ready in a few minutes.
“Sorry, sweetie,” Megan said. “You can have one after dinner.”
“Aw.” Ella hopped down from the counter and crossed the room to Reid. “Mr. Reid, why isn’t the tree decorated?”
A warm expression crossed Reid’s face. “Jess and I haven’t had time to do it.”
“Can we do it tonight?”
“Ella,” Megan warned. “That’s something Mr. Reid likes to do with Jessie, and she’s not here.”
“I wish she could come over.” Ella’s lower lip pouted out as if resigned, but then she moved right up to Reid and gazed at him with the angelic face that Megan had a hard time saying no to. “Can Jessie come home?”
Reid narrowed his eyes, and Megan crossed the room to step in. “It’s not nice to intrude on their tradition, Ella. Our tree is up and waiting for us. We’ll finish it together as soon as we get home.”
“I know.” Her tone was sullen. “But it hasn’t been the same since Daddy left. We’re not a family anymore.”
“Yes, we are, sweetie. Just a family of two.”
“Two isn’t fun. I like it better when there’re lots of us. Like when Nana and Papa help.”
“They’ll be here next Christmas.”
Ella’s lip began to quiver.
Megan offered Reid an apologetic look for putting him in the middle of this. His soft gaze was still on Ella. He was so gentle and patient with her. Far more so than Orrin had ever been. If Reid hadn’t chosen his job over her, he would be her child’s father.
Oh wow. Talk about coming out of left field.She recoiled. Thinking that way was almost like wishing Ella had never been born, and that was the last thing Megan wished.
Reid took Ella’s hands. “Since this is so important to you, I’ll call Jess to see if she wants to come home.”
“Yippee!” Ella yelled.
“Don’t get your hopes up too fast,” Reid cautioned. “She might have plans with her grandparents tonight.”
“Call her. Call her.” Ella danced as Reid took out his cell.
Megan took Ella’s hands to calm her before she wore herself out too and was unable to have fun decorating with Reid and Jessie.
Not that Megan was eager for the event. She wanted to see Ella enjoy the tree, but bringing Jessie over here and the four of them decorating would be so much like a family that parting from them would be hard. Not only for her, but for Ella too.
“Her grandpa will drive her over after they finish eating.” Reid stowed his phone.
