“If I planned to kill you, I would have done it in that pit. And then I would have killed the other women. It’s what they intended for me to do; it’s why you were there and why I was there.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
When his gaze shifted to her, she forced herself not to flinch away from those red eyes, which were the most unnerving things she’d ever seen.
“Because of you,” he stated.
“Me?”
“Yes,you. I don’t know what it is about you, and I’m too fucking thirsty to figure it out, but I stopped because ofyou.”
Chapter Ten
Before she could reply,he pulled her into an alley. A cold sweat broke out on her skin as she realized no one could see them in here. She highly doubted anyone on that street would have helped her, but having people around had given her a little security. It was gone.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“Until I feed, I’m not much good to either of us. I can’t….”
Lucien lowered his head and, using the heel of his hand, slapped his forehead a few times as he tried to regain control of his jumbled thoughts. But the word hungry had started to replay on incessant, whiny loop in his head. He didn’t know if he despised his lack of control or that whiny tone more.
“Feed on what?” Callie asked nervously.
“Right now, I don’t care what it is, as long as it has blood.”
Callie tried to tug her arm free, but his grip tightened. She suppressed a wince when his fingers bit into her skin. Memories of Carter flashed through her mind, and she tried to bury the panic swelling within her like a rising tsunami.
“Let go of me!” she cried.
He released her as if she’d burned him. “I’m sorry…. I’m not…. This isn’t who I am. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to. I won’t…. itwon’thappen again.”
Lucien couldn’t recall the last time he ever apologized to anyone, or if he’deverapologized to anyone before, but suddenly he wanted to crush her against him as he wrestled against the madness threatening to consume him. However, he didn’t dare touch her for fear he would injure her again.
He was making a massive mess of this.Making a mess of what?
That was a good question, and if he could think straight, he might be able to figure out the answer. But right now, all he could think about was keeping her safe and with him.
Callie rubbed her arm as she studied him. The confusion on his face and the anguish in his voice all made her think he truly meant what he said, but she wasn’t an idiot; most abusers spewed apologies after committing their crimes.
It was clear he was unstable and on the verge of losing it. An unhinged vampire seemed about as safe as a nest of pissed-off vipers, but the sorrow in his red eyes touched something in her.
Unable to stop himself, he touched her cheek. As he connected with her, she flinched away before recovering and lifting her chin. Her eyes blazed with defiance, but he’d seen something in them… something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.
He’d seen it before, but it was clearer this time. It was more than terror, more than disgust and distrust. It was raw and primal, and he hoped never to see it from her again.
“I’m sorry,” he said again.
Callie nodded, but Lucien sensed her hesitation and wariness of him. She had every right to distrust him. He kept scaring her when it was the last thing he wanted to do. He slapped at his temples as he tried to clear his mind.
It didn’t help.
When he lifted his head to take her in, he saw the look of a cornered animal staring down the throat of their enemy. It withered something inside him. He deserved that look, but he would prove to her that she could trust him. He just didn’t know how when he kept fucking everything up.
He hadn’t even realized he was scaring her this time. Until he fed, he was a threat to her, and he couldn’t allow that to continue.
At the end of the alley, he scented the air and turned to the right. They made their way through a few more side streets before coming to a neighborhood that looked as if only a bulldozer could save it.
Most of the houses sagged with decay and age; many of them had no windows or plywood in place of glass. The cars on the street were missing tires or sat on flat tires. Some looked as if they might still run, but others were shells that housed countless rodents.
