I don’t need the details. My head supplies plenty on its own. Enemy fire over armored metal. Menout of position. Someone trying to go back, because leaving men behind was not an option any of us were built to accept.
He doesn’t say Tyler’s name, but he doesn’t have to.
“You know what set it off,” Buck says evenly.
I answer before Calder does. “Elena.”
He draws in a long breath and lets it out slow. “Doesn’t matter why.”
“It does if you plan to do something about it,” I say.
His laugh is cold and humorless. “What exactly do you suggest?”
Buck answers first. “Stop pretending it’s handled just because you’re still upright.”
“And stop deciding by yourself what makes you useful,” I say.
Calder is staring at the floor when he says, “It hit me without warning, and if I lock up on a call that matters?—”
Buck cuts him off. “You didn’t lock up. You took a hit and kept going.”
“I lost time.”
“A couple of seconds,” I say. “And then you worked.”
Calder looks up, frustrated. “Seconds matter.”
I keep my expression neutral. “That’s why we covered them.”
Buck slides back from the table. “You can’t protect anybodyif you hide the problem from the only people in a position to help you manage it.”
Calder goes quiet, and I can tell by the look on his face that he knows Buck’s right.
I close the lid on the pizza box and pull it toward me. “You want the good news?” Calder looks over at me. “We haven’t smothered you in your sleep, so you haven’t become completely insufferable.”
He stares at me, then drags a hand over his mouth. It’s not a laugh, but it’s close enough.
“Tonight, you’re running drills with me,” Buck tells Calder.
Calder frowns. “For what?”
“So the next time this flares up, your body has somewhere better to go.”
“You’re assigning me homework now?”
“Yes.” Buck gets to his feet.
Calder shakes his head once and reaches for his mug.
Better this is out in the open than buried where it can do damage.
I finish my coffee, toss the box, and get back to work.
CHAPTER 13
CALDER
I spend my first day off on the ridge above my cabin, wearing a loaded pack and hiking the trails with the sharpest inclines. I put in miles until my calves burn, and all I can hear is my own breathing and the crush of my boots on snow and pine needles.
