My response turns to mist, disappearing in my mouth.
Am I innocent?
If I am, I don’t feel it.
After all, I brought Silas into our lives. I chose to work at the casino. I fell for his lies, blinded by the scraps of attention he offered. Same as I did with Reed.
Worst of all,Iwas the one who convinced Zara to go with me up to the top of?—
Mercifully, Kenzie cuts off my thoughts before they go to that dark, dank place. “Your family was wrong about you, babe. You’re not a broken woman.”
“Really?”
“Absolutely. There’s so much beauty and love inside you. You couldn’t be broken if you tried. We’ll get through this together, just like we did when you lost your sister.”
She likely knew where my thoughts were going and threw me the life preserver.
With a touch of hope steadying my voice, I ask, “Promise?”
“Cross my heart.”
My sadness lifts like a morning fog clearing in the sun. While a few words on the phone aren’t going to change the way I view myself, it’s enough to get me back on track for tonight.
Let the past die in the past.
“Thanks for loving me,” I blurt out, grateful tears pricking my eyes. “You tease me so much that I sometimes forget the way you build me up when I need it most.”
“I only tease because I’m jealous of how awesome you are. You know that, right? I’m a terribly spiteful person.”
“Right, right. Sarcasm is your love language. I remember.”
“You good now?”
“Yeah. I got this. The plan is back on.”
“Good girl. You’ve still got that gummy I gave you if you panic again, right?”
“Yes, but I don’t need drugs.”
“It’s not meth. Just a little weed.” She sighs audibly. “Now go seduce my brother. But not like...allthe way. Only a little. Just the tip. Savvy?”
A smile crests my lips. “Okay, Jack Sparrow.”
I’m giggling when we end the call.
With that out of the way, I put my phone on the charger and strip off my clothes. I’m tempted to have aneverythingshower, but if I do, I’ll be more likely to end up in bed with Reed. And that’snoton the agenda. So I settle for a quick shower and only shave below the knee.
My prickly thighs can serve as a chastity belt.
Looking down, I murmur, “Thank you for your service, thunder thighs.”
As I step under the spray of the shower, my facetious grin washes away.
I remember the first time that phrase was flung at me as an insult.Thunder thighs. How can two simple words cut so deeply while simultaneously sounding so absurd?
Over time, I learned to take the power back from those types of phrases. Control the narrative. If I use them first, they can’t hurt me, right?
Unfortunately, nothing ever fully erases the sting from the burn they once caused.
