"Deciding for both of us."
"Somebody has to."
"Why."
My eyes sting.
"Because I don't trust it, Gray. Because three days ago I didn't know your last name and last night I said things to you I haven't said to anyone in three years and my body believed it and my brain is playing catch up and my brain is the part that pays rent."
"Your brain is scared."
"My brain is smart."
"Your brain is scared and pretending to be smart."
"Don't."
"Simone."
"I said don't."
I stand up. The blanket falls.
"I'm going to Toronto Tuesday. I'm going to do my job. I'm going to sit in my apartment and wash my grandmother's pan.And you and I are going to figure out what this is from a distance because that's the version of it I can survive."
"The version you can survive."
"Yes."
"Not the version that's actually happening."
"Gray."
"You want me to agree with you."
"I want you to understand me."
"I understand you fine. You're running. And you're using logistics to do it."
It lands like a hand.
I stare at him.
"Fuck you, Mercer."
"Yeah."
"That's not fair."
"It's accurate."
"Don't use my own lines on me."
"Then don't hand them to me."
I turn and go inside.
I go upstairs.
