Joseph’s gaze flicked to the rearview mirror at his son, fast asleep in the back seat. A lock of long dark hair fell over one eye and his pouty lower lip jutted open, nearly breaking his heart. River was changing every day and growing so fast, but he was still such a baby in so many ways. Josephwastrying to be happy for River, or at the very least, functional. It wasn’t easy on most days, but his son was the one thing that kept him going. As it turned out, the house, the change of scenery, and even his strange friendship with Carolina were also helping him from diving off the deep end.
“Sometimes I just wish she was here,” he said. “I wish I could tell her all of that in person. There are so many things that she wanted to do in life and we never got around to it.”
“Like what?” Carolina said.
The entrance to Jacaranda Manor came into view as they rounded the corner. Joseph caught Carolina visibly brace herself from the corner of his eye. The temperature dropped again as they turned into the long drive leading up to the estate. Joseph nearly forgot that up until that very day, Carolina had been terrified to leave the grounds. He couldn’t see what she was afraid of, but the horror and pain on her face told him everything he needed to know.
“Please keep talking to me Joseph,” she said, squeezing her eyes shut. “I don’t want the mist to come back. Distract me. Tell me what Rachel wanted.”
Joseph drove slowly down the tree-lined drive, searching the dark pine scrub forest for any signs of trouble. Flashes of Rachel came flooding back; her disappointed expression as she called him to the dance floor at her sister’s wedding. All the times she wanted to go for a walk after dinner but he was too tired. All the times she had just wanted his attention but he was too busy wallowing in his own self-made misery. As Carolina’s spirit cringed beside him, all of the ways that he came up short in his marriage came flooding back.
“She wanted to dance,” he said, his voice wavering. “She always wanted to dance and it wasn’t my thing. I should have danced with her.”
“What else?” Carolina said, still bracing herself on his shoulder with an icy hand.
“She wanted to watch the sun rise,” he said. Salty, hot tears formed at the corners of his eyes. “I just wanted to sleep in. I didn’t care about it.”
Carolina’s hands gripped harder around his shoulder as the manor finally came into view. Her eyes opened and she relaxed her grip as his tires crunched over the gravel drive. Joseph wiped at the wetness on his cheeks with the back of his hand.
“The mist wasn’t there,” she whispered.
Joseph sucked in a deep, ragged breath. The one pressing question that had truly weighed on him from the moment he met Carolina couldn't be held back any longer. He had to know.
“Why isn’t she the one haunting me?” he sniffed. “Why you?”
Carolina’s shoulders slumped as she looked up at the dark face of Jacaranda Manor. The two rectangular eyes of the third floor windows looked down upon them in disdain.
“You and River must have loved her so well,” she finally said. “Perhaps she didn’t have any unfinished business.”
Joseph shook his head, his hands still gripping the wheel.
“I don’t know how to make things right.”
Carolina’s figure brightened as they sat in the Jeep, neither of them ready to move.
“Richard was like you in a way,” she mused. “I always wanted to go dancing too. He was too reserved.”
Joseph sighed and nodded his head. He looked over at Carolina, who was positively glowing once again. He was tired. Soul-crushingly, heart-wrenchingly bone tired. But with Carolina smiling back at him, and a new year with new possibilities ahead of him, that sense of hope and renewal returned, if only momentarily. Maybe hehadbeen enough for Rachel, even though he would never be able to accept it. Maybe not. Still, there was one person that he could help to make things right with now. One lost, disappointed soul that was right before his eyes.
“I think I have an idea.”
***
Joseph closed the doorof the study after tucking River into bed, still fast asleep and clutching one of the new action figures he had received for Christmas. When he returned to the sitting room, Carolina was still there perched on the chaise lounge and staring at the illuminated tree. It had been over a week since Christmas and it would be time to take down their few decorations soon, but as he watched the spirit stare up at the multicolor lights and ornaments, he decided perhaps he could keep them up just a little bit longer.
“Funny thing, Christmas trees,” she mused. “We chop them down and dress them up, only to throw them away when we’ve had our fun.”
Joseph frowned and shoved his hands deep in his pockets.
“Well, when you put it that way, it does sound pretty awful.”
Carolina looked up at him and smiled.
“I’m sorry. I don’t mean to put a damper on things.”
“It’s all right,” Joseph said. “I was thinking about getting a fake tree, but Rachel always liked real trees. We would rent a car and drive out of the city just to go get one from a farm. Figured I would keep up the tradition.”
“That sounds lovely,” Carolina said, rising to meet his eye. She gave him a half sort of smile, her glowing form dim to match her expression. It was odd, but Joseph was beginning to become accustomed to reading her changes in brightness and temperature, like a bulb that grew brighter when she was happier. Warm, like the sun coming out from behind the clouds.
