“It is. How is it any different for him than it is for me? What you said was so insulting, I don’t even know how to explain it to you. This is why I didn’t want to come back all these years. I hate your stupid small-town mentality. When my career seemed to be going somewhere, you bragged to everyone about it. Once it went downhill, you suddenly ‘knew’ it was always a bad idea. You’re just worried about what other people think. So what makes you the authority on what anyone should do with their time? There are different ways to live a life, and yours isn’t better than mine. I want to do what I enjoy, and making music with Alex is the best I’ve felt in years. That doesn’t mean I’m going to abandon my degree, but of course, you’d assume that. Because nothing anyone does is ever good enough unless it’s exactly whatyouthink they should be doing. It doesn’t matter if it’s me, Mila, or even Alex. You always act like your decisions are the only right ones.”
“My decisions put a roof over my family’s head. They paid for your tuition. They put food on your plate.”
“Do you want a medal for that now? Just because something worksfor youdoesn’t mean it works for everyone. Why do you think my choices will never get me there? It’s my life, damn it! Why can’t I be happy the way I want to be?”
“You wouldn’t be happy even if you didn’t have to do anything all day.”
From then on, the two of them shouted over each other. Neither was willing to give in, so the argument went in circles. Their voices grew so loud they hurt my ears. Laura tried to get between them, yelling for them to stop, but it didn’t help. They were at each other’s throats like two dogs that wouldn’t back down until one of them won, whatever there was to win in that argument.
Why couldn’t they see that they at least had each other? That they cared enough to get this heated?
Dany wasn’t the bad parent Seb made him out to be. He cared enough to worry about him and speak up when he thought it mattered.
And Sebastian wasn’t the asshole chasing castles in the sky Dany painted him as. He was hardworking and focused, and clearly cared about his parents’ opinion more than he let on. If he didn’t, he wouldn’t shout back.
“Well, you don’t get to make decisions for me.”
I hadn’t spoken to my mom in years.
“Once you have a family to care for, we can talk again.”
She never fought for me.
“I can’t stand you.”
She never reached out to see if I was doing okay.
“That makes two of us.”
She never cared about me like this.
“Sometimes, I wish you weren’t my father.”
“And I wish you weren’t my son.”
The noise pelted me from all sides. It tore through my ears, wrapped around my brain, yanking at it as if it was trying to rip it out of my skull.
My neck, jaw, chest—my whole body tensed.
I gasped for air, but couldn’t breathe.
The pain became too much to bear.
“Shut up,” my body yelled before I could think. “Shut up,shut up—SHUT UP.” My hands clenched into fists as I hit my head again and again, trying to make everything stop. My face flushed. My chest heaved. Saliva dripped from my mouth. My ears buzzed, even as the silence that followed stretched on.
When I came back to myself, I found them all staring at me like they couldn’t believe what I’d done. I couldn’t either. I had just yelled at them—at the people who gave me a roof over my head, and the one person who made me feel loved and wanted.How could I possibly stay in the same room with them?
“I’m sorry,” I muttered before everything went blurry.
I heard my feet pounding…
…a door slamming behind me…
…gravel crunching beneath my shoes…
…and a bird cawing in the distance.
My eyes didn’t register what I was seeing.
But I knew I was running.
Alone.
Because that’s how things always end for me.
