‘Which do you think is true for Alison and Nathaniel?’
‘I’m guessing number two,’ Reshma said with a smile. ‘But judging my clients would be inexcusable.’
They paused to stretch and Toni’s gaze fell on the slightly hazy, mountainous formation that was the Isola d’Elba, aroundten miles away. That was the tiny world Gabri had reduced himself to when life got too much. It was a beautiful hideaway.
‘What about you?’ Reshma asked, which was probably fair play, since Toni had touched a nerve of hers. ‘Would you get married here? To a hypothetical groom who will never exist?’
She eyed Reshma. ‘Hypothetically? Maybe I would, you know.’
Still looking out to sea, Reshma continued, ‘It’s easy to be cynical, but when you witness number three, you have to accept that hope is just as powerful. Weddings look to the future, not the past, and that’s a sentiment I approve of.’
Toni studied her, thinking of Sophie and Ginny, the two other wedding planners she was starting to call friends, and Kira, her colleague from Great Heart who’d been dragged kicking and screaming into the world of weddings and then found her own soulmate in the least likely candidate. Toni had never felt like one of them; her life was too different. Maybe that had been the self-pity talking.
But one difference was insurmountable: they could look to the future, while part of Toni would always be tied to the past. Besides, Sophie was engaged and Kira was so clearly enamoured with her new boyfriend. And Reshma…
Emboldened by the conversation, Toni risked the question. ‘Whatisgoing on between you and Will, by the way? We all know your business meetings don’t have to happen out of hours.’
But Reshma replied with the perfect deflection: ‘Oh, probably something similar to what’s going on between you and Gabri.’
Did that mean Reshma was just as confused? Or was she talking about attraction and opportunity? That thought made her wince.
They arrived back at the southern port of Marina di Campo in plenty of time to drive back for dinner. After the peacefulday by the water, forgetting her own troubles, Toni was feeling tentatively hopeful about the wedding, increasingly confident that she wouldn’t ruin it. She was looking forward to a quiet dinner with Cillian and Daphne with no grand subterfuge to carry out.
But when they pulled into the car park at the resort, there was Gabri, leaning against the pillar at the entrance, clearly waiting for someone. Toni’s equilibrium fled. She hated it, how she didn’t know what to feel when she looked at him – more likely she was afraid of everything she did feel.
He was so horribly beautiful to look at – even more so than that first time she’d admired him as he sipped his espresso at the bar. Even though he turned her upside down, the hit of endorphins when she saw him could grow addictive if she let it.
Reshma squeezed her arm. ‘I’ll take the guests down for dinner.’
Toni nodded, hoping Reshma understood the thank you that was stuck in her throat along with her breath. As soon as the wedding party dispersed, Gabri took a step purposefully in her direction, sending her nerves off on a trip. But his pained expression suggested this might not end in another intimate hug.
‘I made a mess of things today,’ he blurted out instead of a greeting. ‘You were right. I shouldn’t have spoken so much to Cillian.’
Her skin went cold in an instant. ‘What happened?’
‘He wanted to know about… us.’
‘Ohhhh, shit.’ She pressed the heel of her hand into her forehead. ‘What did you tell him?’ She should have made sure she was back early yesterday to speak to him. What had she been thinking, bringing him along on this trip when she had so much to do?
‘I told him we were friends, but he didn’t believe me.’
‘Why not?’
‘He said we hugged differently. Your friend Andreas doesn’t hug you like that.’ His brow was low – the gruff look she recognised with a twinge – his mouth flat under the moustache. ‘Then he suggested that if I were truly your friend, I’d visit you at your home and when I said I wouldn’t, he accused me of hurting your feelings and honestly, I wasn’t so sure I haven’t.’
When he said so categorically that he wouldn’t visit her, that did hurt her feelings, no matter how emphatically she told herself she’d never expected that. Their week together had been perfect, but even Toni, with all her cynicism, was surprised by how quickly it had all crumbled in the face of her normal life.
‘My feelings are my own business. That’s what we agreed,’ she reminded him.
‘Does that mean you feel… Toni, I wanted—’ He lifted his hand too quickly for her to stop him – or perhaps she didn’t want to. However it had happened, his fingers were smoothing her hair and her breath stuttered.
But if she sank into those sensations, she’d have to admit that she’d kept this part of her dormant – dead – for nine long years.
‘Toni,’ he managed, full of breath and… frustration. ‘If things were different?—’
She cut him off with a vehement shake of her head. ‘Don’t say it. That’s a train of thought I can’t entertain. It leads to the bottom, and I can’t go there again.’
He didn’t follow her instructions, the reckless idealist. ‘This week was more than an awkward first date,’ he insisted, studying the progress of his thumbs on her cheeks. ‘A lot more than convenient, opportunistic sex. We created something together. Isawyou, Toni, like the insides of an expensive Swiss watch, all intricacies and delicate design and beauty.’
