“Why’s that?”Jem said.
“He was a hardass.”
“He has—” Quinn grimaced.“—hadhigh expectations.”
“What does that mean?”Tean asked.
“It means zero margin of error for fucking up,” Beckett said.“Andifyou fucked up, he ripped you a new asshole.”
“But you weren’t worried about Gerald catching you?”
Beckett snorted, but Quinn’s expression was troubled.
“How did people in the group feel about Gerald?”
“They worship him,” Beckett said.“They talk shit about him, but they worship him.”
“Sounds complicated,” Jem said.
With a shrug, Beckett said, “Not so much.Kind of like a dad you can’t ever make happy.You know you shouldn’t care.You bitch about him, make fun of him, but if he says, ‘Jump,’ all you want to do is jump high enough that he’s proud of you.”
Tean tilted his head as he considered Beckett.
“That makes sense to you?”Jem asked.
“It’s a common dynamic in the church,” Tean said.“You have to understand that church leaders have a huge presence in the members’ lives.They’re supposed to have spiritual insight into you and your actions, as well as divine guidance.You’re expected to follow what they tell you.To a certain extent, you’re expected to follow without questioning, although that…varies.”
“The blue cup thing.”
“He told you about that?”Beckett said with a roll of his eyes.“Yeah, that was President Fitzpatrick.”
“What was the deal with him and Stephen?”Jem asked.
“You mean his big success story?”Beckett asked dryly.
“You don’t believe him?”Tean said.
“I mean, if it worked, then itreallyworked.”
“You don’t think he’s gay?”Jem asked.
“Like, not at all.”
“He might be bi,” Quinn said.
Beckett didn’t say anything, but the expression on his face told Jem what he thought about that.
“If he’s not gay,” Tean said, “then what’s he doing here?”
“Hewasgay,” Quinn said.“That’s the whole point.President Fitzpatrick fixed him.”
“Jesus, Quinn,” Beckett said.
“That’s not what I meant.You know what I mean.That’s why he’s different.Because Stephen was gay, and he didn’t want to be, so President Fitzpatrick helped him.”
“Have you met any other success stories?”Tean asked.
Quinn opened his mouth and then shut it again.He played with his towel.Then he said, “President Fitzpatrick has told us about a lot of guys he’s helped.”
