“What if it never stops?” she asks.
“It will pass. We just have to get through it.”
She nods in defeat. Then she turns her head away as I take over with my hand between her legs, rubbing her clit in gentle strokes.
“Harder,” she says between her teeth. “Please.”
I do as she asks, applying more pressure. Though her moans are painfully erotic to my ears, and my cock is already stiff under my trousers, I focus solely on pleasuring her. When I rearrange myself so I can attend to her with my mouth, Selene’s eyes fly open.
“You don’t have to do that.”
Selfishly I answer, “Yes, I do.” Even if I don’t get to have her, I need to taste her.
This time, I ravish her with my tongue. As I plunge two fingers into her, I manage to squeeze in a third, hoping that maybe it will help. She bucks and moans, but there’s a misery even in her pleasure that makes me go flaccid again.
When she finishes, it is with a gush that covers my lips and tongue. I drink her up, and once more, I feel that odd tingling sensation in my groin.
Selene sniffles when I pull away.
“Thank you, Harry,” she says, and finally, she looksinto my eyes. “I want you to know how grateful I am for you. I’m sorry that I burdened you like this.”
I frown at her, not sure where this is coming from. “It’s not a burden. I want you to feel well again.”
She just sighs, then nods and lies down in her nest, pulling up her new sheepskin blanket to cover herself. I look over her one last time, curled up in that blanket, and wish I could do anything to truly ease her pain.
Smoothing back some of her hair, I draw away, then see myself out of the room for the rest of the night.
When I getto work the following evening, I’m worn out from my schedule moving to and fro. I helped Selene one more time this afternoon and didn’t think to wash before coming. I know that’s a mistake the moment the other two guards in the room—Greld and Stellan—stand and turn to stare at me.
“What’s thatscent?” asks Stellan in wonder. “Whoa. You smell like a girl, Harry.”
Greld snickers. “He has one at home now. Doncha, Harry?”
I grimace as I set my bag down. “I don’t think it’s much of your business.”
At that, Stellan hoots. “So defensive!”
“He’s got it bad,” agrees Greld, smirking at me. “And it smells like a really pretty lady, at that.”
“I’ve got a job to do,” I say, putting my bag in my locker and my keys in my pocket. I grab my musket and scabbard off the wall, then put them on, too.
Stellan waves at me as I head out the door. “Invite us to the wedding!”
As I stalk away from the guardhouse, there’s a tingle of dread at the base of my spine.
9
SELENE
When Harry leaves that night for work, I’m loath to see him go. It’s always lonely when he’s absent, even though I wonder now if it’s just as lonely when he’s home. I regret how I behaved when he brought out the glass phallus, and it’s hard to even look him in the eye.
I try to fill the hours with teaching myself to read again. I recognize enough that I can put letters together into words, but it takes ages just to get through a single page, sounding out each word as I go.
A good enough way to occupy my time, I suppose.
After I’ve read a couple of pages about the adventures of a maritime explorer, I’m too tired to keep going, and I drop the book over the edge of my nest. I spent some time earlier remaking it after our activities, but it’s still not right. Something is missing, inside and out. It’s not big enough, not soft enough, not…somethingenough.
I wish I understood.
