Pain lanced through my chest again, sharp and debilitating, dragging me to a halt. Throwing my head back, I howled, pouring everything into it, everything I couldn’t speak out loud.
I wanted himso badlyI ached with it.
My human side, my wolf, all of me yearned to run back to Axel and beg him to change his mind. I knew he wanted me, knew he’d felt somethingmorethat night.
My instinct had never steered me wrong, not in all twenty-eight years. And despite what I’d told Axel, it hadn’t now. But for whatever reason, he refused to acknowledge any of it. And the frustration, thehurt, that I was powerless to do anything but take him at his words, it all flowed out of me in the mournful howl that chased away the birds in the trees above.
My pack would hear it.
Ryswould hear it if he was anywhere on pack territory, and no doubt we’d be having a chat when I returned home if that was the case.
Whatever he had to say wouldn’t change anything. I’d talked to Axel, like I’d said I would, and I guessed we’d resolved things after months of avoiding the issue.
The fact that the outcome wasn’t what I’d wanted didn’t matter.
Had I really expected anything different?
No.
But I’d hoped.
And that was the cruellest emotion of all.
Because it was gone now, leaving a hole in its place. An emptiness that left me unsettled, restless, not knowing how to move forwards now that I didn’t have that sliver of hope to cling to anymore.
But that was a problem for human me.
Embracing the escape of my wolf, I let my base instincts take over, shutting off the voices in my head, and ran.
* * *
I didn’t meanto circle back around to Axel’s house, but that was where I ended up. I should’ve turned away, gone back to the pack house, but the soft timbre of Axel’s voice kept me rooted to the spot.
From this far out, it was hard to make out all the words. I strained to hear him, found myself edging closer. In my shifted form, I had far fewer hang-ups about shamelessly eavesdropping.
Axel was talking and I wanted to know what he was saying.
Simple.
I edged closer still.
“If Dathal and the others hadn’t got there when they did…” Axel’s voice faltered, and I whined at the despair in it.
“You think Zh’alek would’ve killed you?” Max asked.
“I… yes,” Axel answered. “I didn’t want to believe it at the time, but he was just so angry when I wouldn’t do what he wanted. Like I’d betrayed him and not the other way around. I’d never seen him like that. If you’d asked me that question before that day, I’d have said no way.”I imagined him shrugging. “I guess we’ll never know.”
“No.”Dathal this time. “And we’re not going to find out, because he’s never getting anywhere near you again.”
I growled in agreement.
Silence.
I waited, pawing at the ground, impatient to know more. Axel had been tight-lipped about his connection to Vai Zh’alek, and I was in no position to ask him about it. We barely spoke about anything these days.
Didn’t stop me being curious.
Whatever had happened to Axel in the Fae Realm, it had been serious enough to send him here and now warrant round-the-clock surveillance. My lip curled back into a snarl.
