Or dead.
Instead of telling me what a twat I’d been, how I deserved to be banished from my coven, Dathal reached for me again and tugged me close enough for him to wrap his arms around me.
I rested my head on his shoulder. I might be physically bigger than him, but I felt safe in his arms. At peace despite the ugly truth I’d revealed.
And how fucked up was that?
I’d known Dathal for less than a week and I’d told him something I still hadn’t told Mase, and he’d been my best friend for years.
“We had a local hunter group nearby, and my behaviour was deemed too dangerous to be allowed to continue. With the council’s agreement, I moved up here to a new coven with the condition that I learnt how to control my magic with the training I’d ignored before.” I swallowed and put enough space between us that I could show him my wrist.
“The council also decided that as punishment for my gross misuse of magic, I wouldn’t be able to access it for nine years.” I traced the mark on my wrist. Three links remained from what had initially been nine, connected together in a circle. “One for each year,” I murmured.
“So you’ve not felt your magic in the last six years?” Dathal’s voice was soft, gentle where I’d expected to hear judgement.
“No.” I shook my head. “I can sense my coven’s magic around me, but it hurt too much at the start, so I became adept at blocking it out.” I shrugged. “I barely notice it now.”
Dathal’s fingers linked with mine as he backed me up against the worktop. The hard edge pressed into my spine, but I was too focused on the intensity in his violet gaze to notice.
“I have enough magic for both of us.” He kissed me again, rough and desperate, as though my words had sparked something inside him that he couldn’t contain any longer.
And I needed it.
Needed him to chase away the pain of what seemed like a lifetime without magic. Every sweep of his tongue, every grind of his hips against mine, everywhere his fingers pressed into my heated skin eased the pain in my soul.
“Show me.”
DATHAL
In the backof my mind, I knew that I should walk away, leave the warmth of Nick’s home, his embrace, and never return, because nothing about us was casual.
Would everbecasual.
I’d suspected what his secret was the moment I’d touched him. Seen the confirmation in his eyes when I’d called for my daggers, knowing that he couldn’t reciprocate when I asked the same of him.
Which was the reason I hadn’t.
I sensed the pain accompanying that secret and no part of me wanted to force him to reveal something that hurt enough to work its way to the surface despite his efforts to hide it.
I wanted him in a way I’d never experienced with anyone else. Axel was right when he’d told Nick that sexual acts with a fae could be different, depending on their magic. It was the main reason I tended to avoid other magic users whenever I travelled through the gateway.
It took conscious effort to prevent my magic from seeking out another’s when both of our guards were down. Something I didn’t want to have to concentrate on whilst trying to get off. If I let it, gave in to the urge and allowed my magic to connect, then the result could be captivating and intimate on a level that I never wanted to experience with a relative stranger.
Like Nick.
And yet it was all I could think of doing.
Every single part of me yearned to let my magic loose and show Nick what it was like to fuck a fae like me with none of the usual safeguards in place.
Jealousy caught me unawares as that thought flitted through my mind, becauseno. Not just a faelikeme.
I wanted to show him what it was like to fuck me, andonlyme.
I ignored the voice in the back of my head telling me how dangerous that was. How opening up to someone like that, exposing my vulnerability, only invited feelings to escalate in a way that could never last.
Axel had been right to warn us about exploring our obvious attraction.
But he’d also been right in telling me to let the high court go fuck itself because nothing had felt immeasurablyrightas having Nick in my arms.
