“You have known who I am,” he managed to say, “all these weeks. As I have shared with you my struggle to recall the simplest details of my life, as I have trusted you and grown to care for the woman I mistakenly thought you to be, you have been deceiving me.”
Her face crumpled, and the tears fell in truth, streaming down her pale cheeks. “Yes, but it is not what you think. I wanted to tell you—”
“Youwantedto tell me?” He unleashed a bitter bark of laughter, his lips twisting into a sneer. “If you had wanted to tell me, you would have done. Instead, you allowed me to wallow in this state of half living, not knowing who I am or where I belong. You lured me into your bed, made me believe myself in love with you. And still, you never spoke the five words which would have changed everything for me.”
“Gavin, please—”
“I know who you are,” he roared, cutting her off once more. “Those were the bloody words, Caroline Sutton. The ones you should have spoken to me instead of all the lies you fed me.”
She. Had. Known.
It was all he could think.
And he was devastated. Ruined. Rocked to his core. Last night, he had fallen asleep thinking himself the most fortunate man in the world, and this morning, he had opened his eyes to a goddamn nightmare.
“I…” She paused, pressing a hand to her lips to stifle a sob before continuing. “You are right. I should have told you. But I was duty-bound to keep the secret. My brother had asked it of me, and I believed I was protecting you by doing so.”
“Protecting me?” His head was throbbing with a new vengeance.
“Yes, protecting you,” she said. “There is someone in the world who wanted you dead, and forgive me for believing it was better to let that someone suppose you were.”
He shook his head, wishing the action would clear the pain confusing his mind, his heart, his very soul. “I don’t believe anything you say. You’re a Sutton and a liar, and I wish to God you had let me die in that fucking street.”
She gasped. “You don’t mean that, Gavin.”
“Aye,” he told her ruthlessly. “I do. I would have been better off.”
Without bothering to collect the remainder of his garments, and without having a care over whether anyone would see him leaving her room half-nude in the early hours of the morning, he spun on his heel and left.
He was going back to where he belonged: the Winter family.
* * *
Caro rushedto don a chemise and gown, not bothering with stays, and bound her hair hastily in a simple braid with shaking fingers. Her heart was in agony, her stomach in knots, and her mouth had gone dry. Gavin had been furious when he had discovered the truth, and she could not blame him for his reaction to her deception. But she was desperate to find him and try to explain before she lost him forever.
If she had not already done so.Merciful saints.
Without bothering to put on slippers, she raced from her room, then down the narrow stairs to the floor housing most of the private rooms. Gavin was nowhere in sight, heightening her panic.
What would he do if anyone tried to keep him from leaving? What if he left before she could catch him and try to speak with him? Where would he go?
The questions were rushing through her mind faster than her traveling feet when she turned a corner and collided with her brother.
Jasper caught her, steadying her, his expression concerned. “Christ, Caro. You can’t go bolting about the halls.”
His voice was annoyed but not alarmed, and it occurred to her that the hour was terribly early for him to be awake. Unless he had not gone to sleep, which would hardly have been surprising, knowing her brother.
Barnaby, one of Jasper’s dogs, was at his side, and the canine let out a loud bark that sounded remarkably similar to an admonition.
She tried to collect her thoughts, but her desperation was rising. “I need to find Gavin. Have you seen him?”
Her brother scowled. “Why would you have need to find him at this time of the morning, sister? What the devil is that mark on your swallow?”
Her hand crept to her throat.Oh, bloody blue blazes.This was not the conversation she wanted to be having now.
Or ever.
“Never mind that. I need to speak with him.” She attempted to wrest herself from her brother’s hold, but he was not having it.
