Louisa hated thinking about the afternoon she received the letter from the duke. And it was even days after the duke’s letter arrived that she received one from her uncle saying he was bringing Nathan home for burial. She vowed that day that her sisters were her responsibility and she would take care of them.
“Does the duke want to take care of all of us?” Lillian asked.
“Does he want to?” Louisa repeated her words and studied over them briefly. Deciding to be completely truthful with them, she answered, “Of course not, Lillian. How could he? He doesn’t know us or love us. But he felt honor-bound to offer because Nathan asked him and he agreed. I believe it was unfair of our brother to ask that of him. I’m sure Nathan wanted us to be cared for in the best possible way and he must have felt the duke could do that better than our uncle. But we have been fine and happy without the duke’s help, haven’t we?”
“Yes,” Lillian said, “but if you married him, you would still take care of us, right?”
Louisa smiled, realizing the situation was difficult for her to understand. “I will always take care of you. I am not going to marry the duke, but if I were to marry him or anyone else, it would be under the condition that all my sisters come with me.” She stopped. “You know, I am older and more set in my ways than the rest of you. It may take me longer than either of you to find a husband, but all of you will be with me until the time that you marry and move into your house with your very own husband.”
“Why aren’t you going to marry the duke?” Gwen asked. “He’s very handsome, and who wouldn’t want to marry a duke?”
“The duke deserves the opportunity to choose his own bride. I want to pick my own husband. Just as when the parties and balls start in a few weeks, Gwen, you will want to pick your husband. You won’t let me choose the man you will marry, will you?”
She grinned. “Of course I won’t, so don’t you even try.”
“And you will feel the same way one day, Lillian. And neither did we want Nathan choosing for us whom we should marry. There was a time when a young lady had to wed the person her father or guardian chose for her.” Louisa smiled and touched Lillian’s cheek affectionately. “Not anymore.”
“Why didn’t you ever tell us Nathan asked the duke to marry you?” Gwen asked.
“I felt you were both too young to know.”
“We’re not children anymore, Louisa,” Gwen said, looking and sounding very grown up.
“I know that now, but Nathan died over two years ago. You had just turned sixteen—and, Lillian, you weren’t even thirteen yet. Besides, it was a halfhearted proposal from the duke that I never took seriously anyway. I knew he was hoping I wouldn’t hold him to his promise. And I haven’t. Not agreeing to marry him was the right thing to do.”
“Why didn’t you tell me before I turned eighteen?” Gwen asked. “You think I’m old enough to marry, but I’m not old enough to know any details about my sister’s life or my brother’s death.”
Even Louisa didn’t know any more information about Nathan’s death. When she’d questioned her uncle about that night, he told her there was no need going into particulars that wouldn’t change the outcome of the fact that Nathan was gone. At the time, she was too shocked to argue with him.
“You are being too hard concerning this, Gwen,” Louisa said. “I only received that one letter from the duke. When I didn’t hear from him again, I thought he had forgotten all about what Nathan asked him to do. I was as shocked as anyone when he came to see me yesterday. I realize now that you both are old enough to know.”
“Thank you for realizing that,” Gwen said.
“I also should have realized that even if Mrs. Colthrust hadn’t told you tonight, someone would have eventually. After all, you are going to be meeting hundreds of people at parties and balls over the course of the Season. From what Mrs. Colthrust has told me, the vow between Nathan and the duke is still talked about all over London. It was only a matter of time until you heard.”
“You can’t shield us from everything, Louisa, though I know you try.”
Gwen was right but it wasn’t easy to let go of the control she’d had these seven years. “So tell me, can you forgive me for not telling you?”
“Of course,” Lillian said, and hugged Louisa.
Louisa knew that Gwen wasn’t ready to forgive her yet, so she added a little more prompting and said, “I should have told you about this when it happened. I’m sorry I didn’t.”
Gwen smiled and threw herself into Louisa’s arms and hugged her tightly. It was amazing what a simple “I’m sorry” could accomplish.
“You know all is forgiven,” Gwen said, “but next time someone thinks about marrying you, will you please tell us?”
“I promise I will,” she said, feeling much better now that she’d managed to avert a huge crisis. It was also time to change the subject, so she said, “Now, I don’t know about you, but I’m getting excited about your first ball.”
“Our first ball,” Gwen reminded her.
Louisa nodded. She didn’t know when Gwen had become such a capable young lady. “Why don’t we work on our dancing tomorrow? We haven’t danced since we’ve been here, and it’s always so much fun.”
“I’d like that,” Gwen said.
“I can play the pianoforte for you while you dance like I did when we were at home,” Lillian offered.
“That would be lovely,” Louisa answered.
