He nods.
“My mother’s going to have a fucking coronary when she finds out.”
“Probably,” he agrees. “But she hasn’t been much of a mother to you, so I wouldn’t concern yourself with how she feels.”
“Don’t pretend to know me,” I warn him. “You don’t know me, no matter what you’ve dug up in my life. You know what’s on paper, and that’s all.”
He ignores my barb and gives me a nod.
“Let’s do this then. Let’s get it over with.”
“I’m going to give you the week to think about it,” he says.
“There’s nothing to think about,” I argue. “Do you want me to do this or not? There’s no point fucking around…”
“There’s something else you should know before you agree.”
Whatever it is, I’m not going to like it.
“This kind of trial, it’s going to be complex. Drawn out. Media everywhere. You’ll be watched closely by the bureau, by the opposing council, by reporters who are out for blood.”
“And your point?”
“Rory Brodrick,” he says quietly.
And suddenly, everything that was so clear has become very hazy.
Rory.
How could I not have factored him into this? I’ve been spending so much time with him, of course Booker would know about him too.
My mouth is dry when I ask my next question.
“What about him?”
“I don’t want to be presumptuous,” Booker says, “but I’d venture a guess in saying that you might care for him.”
He takes my silence as an affirmative.
“If you don’t want him involved in this… if you don’t want to arouse suspicion of the syndicate by bringing heat down onto them, then you’ll need to stay away from him.”
And there it is.
My clarity.
This morning, things with Rory were so gray. Muddled and confused and uncertain. But Booker’s words make it very black and white. And I have to confront the very real feelings I’ve been trying so hard to deny.
I do care for Rory.
I’m in love with him.
And that’s as real as it’s ever going to get for me.
“Why would you do that?” I ask Booker. “Why would you warn me? If you know what they do…”
“I don’t believe Rory Brodrick is a bad man,” he says. “But the practices of criminal syndicates are generally the same the world over. If they catch you talking to the feds, what do you think would happen?”
I know what would happen.
