“He’s generous,” Iseabail contradicted. “He’s sponsoring me, and he didn’t need to.”
“Right,” said Sadie. Then she looked at Mairi. “So if it’s not fear of the laird, and it’s not because he’s bad in bed, why aren’t you marrying him?”
Trust Sadie to be the blunt one. The woman had no patience with subtext or subtlety. She wanted life to be black and white and fun all the time now that her mother was gone.
Usually, Mairi wholeheartedly agreed with such sentiment, but not today. Not about this. Today she was more like Iseabail in her silent watching of the world while plotting her next move. Except, in that, Mairi was also completely flummoxed. She had no idea what her next move was. She was just… she was… she felt…
“Mairi?” Iseabail asked. “You look like you’re about to explode.”
“I… I…” She dropped her head back to knock against the wall. “I don’t want to love him.”
The two women gaped at her. It was Iseabail who broke the silence first.
“Whyever not? I’d marry him in a heartbeat if he gave me a second look.”
Mairi held up her hands in confusion. “I just don’t. He’s…” What? Perfect? Gentle? Irritating as hell? Sure of himself? Cocky? Damn, she had so many words for Connall, and none of them fit right. Or maybe all of them did. “I’m so tired of myself.” And that was the truest statement she’d ever said. “Connall is wonderful, but I will not say yes to him.” She shook her head. “It’s madness. I don’t understand myself.”
Iseabail had no answer except to squeeze her hand in sympathy. Sadie, however, was of a much more practical mindset.
“I know why,” she said firmly. “It’s because you’re so busy working all the time. You’ve got to do the meals for the countess, manage the money for your dresses, charm the Sassenach, and worry about us. You need to do nothing for anyone today.”
“What?”
Iseabail clapped her hands. “A nothing day? What a marvelous idea!”
“What are you talking about?” Mairi demanded. “We’re having a London Season.Everyday is a nothing day.”
“No,” Sadie countered. “Every day is a husband-hunting day. That’s different.”
“Very different,” Iseabail agreed. Then she cocked her head. “No wonder you don’t want Connall right now. You’d be a laird’s wife and a future duchess. There’d be no end of things to do all the time.”
Sadie clapped her hands. “Then it’s decided. Today is a nothing day. I say we start by wandering the shops.”
Mairi shook her head. “I haven’t any money—”
“We’re justwandering,not buying. You’ll see.”
Iseabail grinned. “It’ll be like a festival day.”
Mairi snorted. “I worked three times as hard on festival days.”
“Then today will be like a festival day you never had.” Sadie grabbed her wrist and tugged her upright. “Come on. We’ll have a full day of doing nothing. It’s the best ever!”
There was no resisting them. They pulled her upstairs to dress for a day spent wandering Mayfair. They were in a carriage within an hour, then spent the day chattering like magpies who laughed about everything. A smart woman could see the edge of fear still lingering in Iseabail’s eyes. A discerning woman could feel how desperately Sadie wanted to feel carefree. And an honest woman would say how much Mairi needed to not be smart or discerning right now. She had to be exactly what she was: a girl with nothing to think about and only fun to experience. At least for today.
“A nothing day,” she said. “I like it.”
They wandered the streets of Mayfair looking in shop windows, laughing at the antics of a dog with a showman, and smiling at gentlemen who tipped their hats at them. They never stopped to talk with anyone else though. Today was not for husband-hunting even at its most casual. Today was for them and it was the best day Mairi had had in years. One that had her laughing nonstop. One where she shared secrets about what had happened last night and how glorious it had felt. One where she admitted that Connall stirred her heart and her belly as no other man. And one where, amid the company of two girls, she finally allowed herself to think about why she had set herself so hard against Connall.
She didn’t like the answer one bit, but she never got to discuss it. The confession was on the tip of her tongue when the unthinkable happened.
They returned to the countess’s home to find the watch waiting for them. Or more specifically, for Sadie and Iseabail. It seemed Mr. Barrett had died. And in a most unexpected way.
