‘The owner’s baby is deaf,’ she pointed out. ‘Her mom and dad both know sign. Your boyfriend is learning sign with classes. Not even YouTube, but real classes, with a real Deaf teacher.’
Basil’s stomach twisted, because it was true, but it didn’t mean there weren’t problems with the whole situation. ‘The people he works with are his family. He loves them, he relies on them. They don’t sign, and I don’t want to speak.’
She gave him a flat look. ‘No one is going to makeyou speak.’
‘They don’t sign, Amaranth. They know baby sign language, and I want more than that.’
She walked around the counter and put both hands on his shoulders, turning him to face her and let their gazes connect for a long time. He was overwhelmed for a second by just how much she looked like their father—the dimple in her chin, the cut of her jaw, the almond shape to her eyes. Her hair held the same curl, a slight frizz in the humidity of spring which framed her face.
He missed his parents and wondered what either one of them would tell him about Derek. They had never cared he was gay, but they hated the idea of Chad, and he never got the chance to ask if it was because they could just tell he wasn’t a good guy, or because they thought Basil should stick to someone in his own community. His aunt had been cut off for assimilating, and even Amaranth had gone months without speaking to them when she had chosen to speak, to attend a hearing school over a deaf one, whenever she brought hearing boys home.
Would they tell him to give it up—that although Derek was a nice boy, it wasn’t enough? And if they did, would he have done it?
‘I know what you’re thinking,’ she told him.
Basil blinked at her, feeling his eyes get a little wet. ‘No you don’t.’
‘Yes,’ she countered. ‘And mom and dad would love him. They’d want to wrap him up tight and chase the pain in his eyes far away. I know they were angry at Aunt Rachel for her choices, but they got over it. And I think it was a lot more than Uncle Rick.’
Basil had long since assumed, but all four of them had died before he got the chance to ask, and he could never be sure. And really, did he want to live his life on a hypothetical answer he could never confirm? Because in the end, his parents were dead. Wherever they were, he liked to think they just wanted to see him happy.
‘Go on your date tonight and stop thinking so much,’ she told him. ‘Let yourself be happy. Derek can make you happy.’
Basil bowed his head, but nodded, because he didn’t have anyplans to turn Derek down, no matter what his parents might have wanted. It still weighed on him, probably always would. The idea of being with Derek made this town feel a little more permanent, and it was in that moment he realized a small piece of him had always planned on going home. Except DC was starting to feel a lot less like home the more time passed.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Derek got a text from Basil saying he was late, and that he’d meet him at the restaurant. The place he’d picked—an out of the way little Moroccan shop complete with shin-high tables, floor poufs, and baskets full of bread instead of silverware—was just on the outskirts of the Cherry Creek mall to really be considered hole-in-the-wall, but it still had an old-world, almost indie feel to it which Derek loved.
The place held twelve tables, which meant they could only seat by reservation, and it meant that the entire meal wouldn’t be overwhelming with noise. He found it funny—the place was dimly lit with no windows, covered in tapestries and artwork, and it should have made his claustrophobia rear its ugly head, except it never did there. Maybe it was the gentle music, or the hands-off demeanor of the service, but he was excited to be able to share the place with Basil and not run the risk of a panic attack settling in.
He arrived a little early, shedding his shoes at the door before he was seated, and he ordered some tea to soothe his nerves as he waited. He toyed with the edge of the menu, then nibbled on some ofthe bread in the center near the little candles, and he checked his phone obsessively like he was almost expecting Basil to cancel.
He hadn’t seen him since the morning after—way too early to feel properly human. But he’d still dragged his ass out of bed to make sure Basil had breakfast and coffee and a long kiss before he had to run out and open the shop. He’d gone back to bed when Basil had gone, wrapping himself in the blanket that still held the faint echo of Basil’s floral scent, and he wanted to keep the other man there every night, so he’d never lose it.
Just when twenty minutes had passed and he started to really panic, he saw Basil’s head poke around the side of the wall and spot him immediately. The relief was almost visceral as he rose, beckoning Basil over, and for just the briefest second, he was captivated by the soft, socked feet padding across the floor. Derek met him with a hand to Basil’s cheek, drawing him in for a soft, chaste kiss.
It felt right again, like a puzzle piece slotting into place where it always belonged. From the faint pink on Basil’s cheeks, he thought maybe the other man felt it too. They settled together, side by side on their cushions, and Basil’s gaze roamed around for a moment, taking it all in.
When he returned his attention to Derek, he laughed quietly and shrugged. ‘New place for me.’
Derek nodded. ‘No one really knows about it, but I like it. The food is good. We can share.’ He held up the menu and tapped on the vegetarian five courses. ‘They play music and have dancers between the entrée and dessert.’
Basil’s eyebrows rose. ‘You take dates here?’
Derek felt himself blush. ‘No. You’re my only date.’
At that, Basil’s lips lifted into a pleased grin, and he nodded, tapping the menu with his long finger. Derek fought the urge to lift his hand, to bite the tip of that finger just to see if he could make Basil’s cheeks go darker, make him squirm a little in his seat. But there was time for that later. Derek was feeling bold, but also romantic.He desperately wanted to give Basil a reason to say, and he knew that was his abandonment and fear talking, but it was also want.
Luckily, his swirling thoughts were interrupted by the server, and Derek checked with Basil to make sure it was fine before he ordered the five courses for them to share. Basil seemed utterly unbothered by Derek taking the lead, and when the server left, Basil even shifted a little closer and instead of saying anything more, he just leaned his head on Derek’s shoulder and relaxed against him. Their hands found each other’s and fingers linked, and Derek felt the soft, beating pulse in Basil’s wrist against his thumb.
‘Long day?’ Basil finally asked, shifting so his hands could be seen properly.
Derek shrugged. ‘No. I had ASL class this afternoon, but I didn’t do well for my presentation.’
Basil’s eyebrows lifted. ‘You’ve been signing very well.’
Derek cleared his throat, flushing a little. ‘I got nervous,’ he admitted. ‘I was…thinking about you.’
