I use a finger to push her chin up until our gazes meet.
“You still OK?” I ask.
She nods, but I can see her anxiety ratcheting up, and I don’t like it.
“Talk to me, Carls,” I command. I need to know we are on the same page.
She swallows hard but doesn’t look away. “Uh…having a baby…it changes you…physically,” she admits.
I breathe a sigh of relief. My beautiful woman is self-conscious and needs to be reassured that she, in fact, is the most sexy lady I’ve ever seen. That, I can do something about.
“What changed? What bothers you now?” I ask.
She looks away this time, and I draw her face back to mine.
“You can tell me anything,” I assure her.
She glances down. “I have stretch marks,” she whispers. “And my boobs aren’t as perky as they used to be. And…” She trails off, and I lean down to look at her.
“And what, baby?” I ask.
“I…haven’t looked myself but…Chad said my…that I wasn’t the same…afterward…down there,” she manages in barely a whisper.
I want to murder her ex. I’ve never felt violence before, not like this, but if that man were here right now, I’d kill him with my bare hands and feel nothing.
Carly’s hand on my cheek pulls me from my anger. “Hey. Where did you just go?” she asks as her soft fingers caress my day-old stubble.
I swallow down my anger and take her face in my hands. “You are beautiful. There isn’t a part of you that isn’t perfect. The fact that your body changed to grow, birth, and nourish Ava only makes you even more beautiful. If Chad didn’t see that, then he’s more stupid than I gave him credit for,” I say as I lean down and kiss her. I feel salty tears and lean back to wipe them away.
“I’m going to erase everything he ever said to you, starting right now,” I promise as I go to shove her a little so she lands on the bed. And that’s when I see the tears streaming down her cheeks.
I fall to my knees and place my hands on either side of her. “Carly, I need to know exactly what happened between you and Chad. Right now,” I say, keeping my voice calm even though inside I’m losing it.
Tears stream down her face, and even in the dim light, I can see her cheeks redden. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. “Fuck. I…I’m so sorry. I…I didn’t think I’d…I’ve never reacted like that…I…” She stumbles over her words, and my hands slowly go to cup her face again, swiping tears.
“Fuck. Carly, what did he do to you?” I whisper. I give her a moment as she takes a few deep breaths.
“The night I left him,” she begins as I search her eyes. “We got in a fight. He said I was ugly and fat. He told me I repulsed him.” She sniffles. “I mean he said a lot that night. After he left, I packed us up and…that was the beginning of the end. He sort of apologized when we finally spoke a few days later, but I just knew in my gut that we could never be happy together, that he’d never really loved me or Ava,” she manages.
I sit down next to her. Sex is the last thing on my mind now.
“Come here,” I say as I gently put my arm around her shoulders and pull her to me. She curls up against me, resting her head on my shoulder. “Tell me what to do.”
She’s quiet for a moment. “Please, don’t let him take this from me too. I want to be with you. I’m sorry I reacted that way. I…I’m glad you know,” she explains.
I weigh my options and decide that I’m going to spend tonight erasing every horrible thing he said to her and every touch that wasn’t loving. She deserves the world, and I’m going to give it to her. If it takes me ten years to undo the damage he did, then so be it. I will gladly be here with her, reminding her just how wonderful she is.
I take her face in my hand and tilt her head up to meet mine. “You tell me if you need me to stop. OK?”
She nods and licks her lips. “OK,” she murmurs as her gaze flickers to my lips.
I turn us and kiss her as I gently undo her bra, and then motion for her to lie on the bed. She lies down, and I help her to remove her panties.
I take a long moment to look at her, to drink in every inch of her body. She’s beyond perfection.
“There’s not one thing I don’t love about what I see right now, baby,” I assure her. She lets out the breath she’s been holding. I practically rip my clothes off before I lean down and lick a stretch mark. She moans as I move further down her body with a heady desire to taste her again. I settle between her legs and run my tongue between her folds. I groan as I taste her. I slowly sink a finger into her, and she levitates off the bed. I chuckle at her reaction.
“Easy there, killer. I’m just getting started,” I tease as I nip at her folds. I ease a second finger inside her and curse her ex when she whispers my name.
