“Yes…oh my god. You guys fucked. You dirty little—”
“Hey! Yes, we uh… we had sex. But now it’s weird and awkward and I don’t know how to act!” I say, a bit of panic in voice.
“Wait, okay. Where did you guys do it? Like in his room or yours? Or maybe right on the couch?” he inquires and my face heats as I think of that night. Me lying on that bench, naked and completely bared to him. Him standing over me, all muscle and power. Completely opposite of how vulnerable he’d been when I found him.
“The locker room…” I cringe.
“Ellie Monroe! Who are you?” Freddie asks facetiously. I cover my face with my hands, my head shaking.
Groaning, I say, “I know, I know. I don’t know what came over me. He was there, he was saying all the right things, and he looked… God, he looked so good. It was like I couldn’t stop myself.”
“Well, why is it awkward?” he asks.
I sigh. “I think it’s only awkward for me. Jamie seems to be flirtier, and I think he thinks it’s going to happen again,” I explain. Actually, I don’t think. I know. If what happened in the kitchen this morning is any indication, he most definitely wants it to happen again.
“And it’s not?” Freddie prods.
“No. It can’t. We work together.”
“Is that the only reason?”
“No.” Shit. Is that the only reason I don’t want it to happen? No, because I’m still worried about what will happen if he heals and goes back to his team. Will he just leave again? Does he assume this is just sex and he’s not going to take it further? My mind spins with different scenarios. This is exactly what I was trying to avoid. This spiral.
“El, you know I love you. I want what’s best for you. I know what he did to you was shitty, and I totally get it if you’re questioning things. In fact, you should be. Men suck. But if there’s any part of you that wants to give it chance, I’ll be here for you. Whether the ending is happy or everything crashes and burns. Got it?”
A stupid tear escapes my eye and runs down my cheek. “Thank you,” I say, sniffling. My eyes catchon the time on my dash. “Shit, Freddie. I’m late, I have to go. I’ll call you soon, okay?”
“You better. I need weekly updates, Bitch. Love you.”
“Love you too,” I tell him before hanging up. Staring out of my windshield, I watch as students walk into the building in front of me. I remember when I was one of them not too long ago. Everything was so much simpler then. I partied with my friends, I had fun, did some stupid shit. Yes, my father got arrested, but that was a long time coming. But most importantly, I’d forgotten Jamie and my past. I’d moved on. Now look where I am. I’m a freaking mess, and I have to go and direct for several hours while trying not to think of the one man I shouldn’t want.
Closing my eyes, I take a long, deep calming breath. And then I jump so hard I almost hit my head on the car ceiling when a tapping sound comes from my window.
Chapter 26
Jamie
When I pull into the parking lot, I spot Ellie’s car immediately. I park a bit further back so she doesn’t see me. I flustered her this morning, and although that was my intention, I kind of felt bad for making her squirm before work. Not bad enough to not do it again, but still. I know she’s trying to avoid me; I can tell by the way she didn’t say a word to me and avoided eye contact with me this morning.
She let herself go with me last night, and now she’s rethinking all of her life choices. I saw it in her eyes this morning when I had her pinned against the counter. She doesn’t know what to think. I knew it wouldn’t be easy to get back into her good graces, and I knew she was going to make this difficult. All I wantis for her to see that I’m making an effort. I’m really trying to be the man she needs. I just hope she can see that.
Grabbing my hockey bag from the back seat and locking my car, I walk toward Ellie’s car. I was just going to go in and leave her be, but then I see the screen in her car. The name Freddie is there. Who the fuck is Freddie? Why is she on the phone with him at nine in the morning?
Before I can stop myself, I tap on her window, causing her to jump an inch in the air. Fuck, she’s cute. When she sees it me, her face goes from scared to annoyed real quick. I seem to have that effect on her. She slowly rolls the window down, glaring at me.
“What the hell are you doing? You scared the crap out of me,” she seethes. I want to chuckle at her attempt at being intimidating, but I’m too annoyed by the name I saw on her fucking screen.
“Who’s Freddie?” I ask, straight faced. Her mouth opens, then closes. She blinks a few times before answering me.
“Are you stalking me now?” she asks. My impatience grows.
“Who is Freddie, Ellie?”
“That’s none of your business, now move.”
My jaw tenses, and my hands turn into fists at my side. I want to keep her here so I can keep interrogating her until she gives me an answer, but we’re both late and I don’t want to get her in trouble. So, I back away so she can swing the door open.
“Thank you,” she says, her voice steady, as if she’s completely unbothered.
