Pain twists in my chest.
X. O.
Hugs and kisses.That’s what I got this year.
He couldn’t even be bothered to write,Love Riley.
I pick up my phone, knowing already that it’s pointless, and punch in the numbers I know by heart.
“Hey, you’ve reached Riley! Leave me a message and …”
Click.
“Alright!Everyonegrabsomegloves and a garbage bag, and let’s get to work! If you find anything you think might be worth saving—beach toys, things like that—bring them over here, and we’ll box them up for donation. Any questions?”
I glance around at my fellow Earth Warriors gathered with me on the beach south of the marina. Everyone’s shaking their heads.
“Okay then!” I clap my hands, indicating we should get started with our clean-up. Every spring, we arrange to comb the public beaches around Llyn Lakes, picking up garbage and other debris that washes up with the ice melt. Sometimes we get other volunteers from around school and town, but the turnout this year has been less than stellar. Only a handful of dedicated environmental club members are here to do the dirty work with me.
Sucking in a deep breath of damp air, I cast my eyes over the wet, trash-ridden sand, then out over the dark lake to the grey sky above it. It’s been a cold and dreary spring.
Depressing. Much like my mood.
I expel the breath slowly, then take another, holding it in my lungs as I fight the emotions that roll over and through me.
Riley and I are done.
At least, I think so. It’s not like he even gave me the courtesy of an actual breakup. He just …forgot about me. I can’t say I didn’t see this coming at this point, given the growing distance he placed between us, but I’m still in disbelief at the way he handled it. Ordidn’thandle it, I guess.
I thought I meant more to him than that.
I thoughtwewere more.
I believed we were meant to be together, thought he was ‘the one’—that what we had was the real deal, true love.
I thought we’d make it through this year, despite its challenges, and be together next year when I was finally able to join him in the city.
What a joke.
Clearly, I didn’t mean as much to him as I thought I did. As much as he meant to me.
Blinking back tears, I release my breath again in a heavy sigh, then snatch up my garbage bag. Huge gusts of air whip from the east across the water, and I have to fight to keep my hair from my face. It sticks to my lip gloss and catches in my lashes. I thinka storm might be rolling. Turning slightly into the wind, I move down the beach, away from the group, wanting—needing—to put some distance between us in case I have another breakdown. They seem to hit me often and without warning lately.
I nibble on my lip, lost in thought as I zig and zag across the sand, crouching sporadically to collect the scattered waste. I still can’t believe it’s been an entire month since I’ve heard from Riley. His team failed to make the playoffs in March, so when the season ended, I was hopeful he’d be able to find some more time for me. But he had endless reasons why it still wasn’t a good time for a visit.
I offered to go there for the big end-of-season dinner the coaching staff was hosting, but he said he would be distracted with his teammates and I wouldn’t have any fun.He didn’t want me to feel neglected.
Ha! I’ve got news for you, buddy …
Next, it was because exams were coming up in April and he’d be too busy studying to entertain me. I offered to help, like I’d done in high school, but he already had his own study groups, and he didn’t think they’d appreciate some girlfriend hanging around.
My friends all told me to forget about him. That he was an asshole. That he probably had some new girl at school, and that’s why he didn’t want me to visit, but I couldn’t believe it. Riley would never do that to me. He’s not that guy. Then again, I never thought he’d blow me off the way he did either.
I pause for a minute to survey my progress, straightening up to stretch my back. I’ve made it further down the beach than I’d realized, almost to the point that juts out into the water, signaling the end of this bay and the beginning of another smaller one. Beyond it lies the narrow marshy area that joins Gryff Lake to Hedd. A bridge spans ‘the narrows’ connecting the small downtown to more residential neighborhoods on the other side. It’s a favorite place for fishermen because the water is shallow and slow-moving there, perfect for trawling. I can’t see beyond the point, though, due to the large rocks that make up the majority of the outcropping.
I’m about to resume my picking when I catch a flash of movement near where the beach gives way to the rougher, rockier terrain. Narrowing my eyes, I zero in on the area. Two kids are scaling the large boulders in an attempt to make their way out onto the point. But the waves are rough today—smashing against the furthest rocks and sending spindrifts high into the air—and the rocks are slippery, slick this time of year with algae and bird poop.
It’s way too dangerous for them to be out there.
