We went so long without words while we showered and got ready for bed, and now this. It was so fucking nice. I felt like I was in a constant state of fight or flight or overstimulation, so this meant even more to me than I could express. I craved quiet and living in the present, and Cam was giving me both. His hand rested gently on my hip, his fingers drawing small, steady shapes.
My eyelids became heavy quickly. The weight of the day catching up with me all at once.
“Stay,” I murmured, already half-asleep.
He didn’t answer out loud. But he stayed. Long enough for my breathing to even out. Long enough for my hand to slip from his chest to the space between us.
Sometime later, I felt the bed shift, a soft rustle of fabric as the weight beside me disappeared. The door clicked shut behind him, and even though I knew he was only a room away, it already felt too far.
23
CAM
Ieased her door shut behind me, then walked across the hall to my room, not bothering to flip on the light. I dropped onto my bed with a sigh, let my head fall back against the pillow, and just stared up at the ceiling.
My body was exhausted. Every muscle loose, my heart is still working overtime. But my mind… my mind went back. I replayed the moment when I stopped thinking of Harper as someone I was obligated to be around because she was my little sister’s best friend.
She was twenty then and in nursing school. Still figuring out the kind of woman she wanted to be and what she wanted to do with her life.
And I remember it like a photograph burned into the back of my brain—back then she wore her hair in the prettiest braids. She always looked so beautiful. I remember Harper standing in my kitchen in a pair of fuzzy socks, wearing a hoodie that was way too big for her, and baggy pajama pants.
Wren had gone to grab takeout and left us alone for maybe ten minutes.
Ten minutes where Harper made funof the music I had playing, tried to dance to it on the tile floor, but ended up slipping and falling. She lay there, laughing, until she cried.
And I just stood there watching her and smiling to myself.
I realized then that we weren’t kids anymore. And I wasn’t just Cameron, the best friend’s brother. Or Cam, the mechanic. Or Cam, the one who kept his head down and did the right thing.
I was Cam, the idiot who was falling in love with a girl who hated him.
She was sunshine, sarcasm, sass, and softness tucked behind walls so high it made you ache to climb them. She was already everything to me, and she didn’t even know it yet. That night changed me more than I cared to admit.
I’d spent the last few years trying to pretend I didn’t feel it every time she smiled. Every time she sat next to me. Every time she laughed. Every shitty comment I threw at her to deflect my feelings tore me up. The witty, mean sarcasm became us. It was our dynamic.
Now she was asleep across the hall after I tucked her in and lay with her until her breathing was calm and even. I closed my eyes, letting the quiet wrap around me like a blanket.
Between my feelings for her and my new feelings for Tucker, I was elated.
A smile tugged at my lips, slow and uncontrollable. Because I was completely, totally, and irrevocably head over heels for that girl. I knew sooner rather than later I would feel the same way about Tucker.
24
HARPER
Iwoke up to an empty bed. The sheets still smelled like him. Well, it technically smelled like us, because I used his body wash last night, but he was gone, and the space beside me was cool.
I reached for my phone and checked the time; it was ten o’clock on the dot. It was hard to believe it was already October. I decided to give Lena a call just to check in. I was hoping she would pick up. It hadn’t been long since I had seen her, but I missed her already.
“Harpie! I just heard your voicemail. What the ever-loving fuck is going on over there?”
I laughed into the phone.“Honestly? So much. Where do I start?”
I could practically see her shaking her head on the other end of the phone.“Maybe start with what the fuck happened after the voicemail?”Someone mumbled something in the background, and Lena responded quickly,“Dax, if I eat one more piece of avocado toast for breakfast, I’ll wither away and die. Can we please just have something sweet or bacon?”
I snickered at their argument. Their personalities go reallywell together. Lena was headstrong, while Dax was more laid back. They both were pretty fashionable, too. Them together just made sense, even though there was a thirteen-year age gap. He knew what he wanted, and all she wanted was him. I really hoped they were going to work through the distance.
“I’m not on speakerphone, right?”
