“Coming home with us?”
I freeze in place, my heart stuttering and my mind going blank. “No, I, uh, I have to record something,” I finally stammer. Without my permission, my eyes flick to Ezra.
By the frown he’s wearing, it’s obvious he knows I’m fibbing.
He goes for the assist, nonetheless. “Why don’t you come over later, then? We’ll pop popcorn and the three of us can watch a movie.”
Lips pressed into a line, I nod. “Sure. I’ll bring candy.”
Kane gives me a long hug, his lanky frame arcing awkwardlyover me. I revel in the affection. I love that he’s so open, both physically and emotionally. As he releases me, I silently praise his mother for raising such a fine young man.
Ezra envelops me in a hug next and kisses the top of my head. “Thank you,” he whispers. “You’re amazing.”
Once the door closes behind them, I lock up and slump against it, pressing a hand to my heart.
He asked if I wascoming homewith them. Shit. I told him I’d be the cool, fun aunt, but there was absolutely nothing fun about today. Today was hard. And Kane is growing attached to me quickly. I want to be there for him, but I don’t know if I’m cut out for this.
Fuck, what have I gotten myself into?
33
Ezra
TODAY WAS HARD.
Millie was magnificent.
What have I gotten myself into?
Fear swamped me when my brother didn’t come home or answer his phone, clouding all rational thought.
The first thing I do when we get back to the apartment is call my mom and apologize for the time Cam and I said we were at a buddy’s in Hoboken when we were really getting drunk. That night, I broke my wrist, and the hospitalin Atlantic Citycalled her. I’d never seen my mom that angry.
“Oh, sweetheart. It’s okay,” she assures me over the phone. “That’s part of being a parent. The good, the bad, the ugly. You get it all. Parenting is mostly just worrying about your kid. Even thirty-six years later, I still worry about you. You know that.”
I huff. Yeah, I sure do.
“What if I’m fu—screwing this whole thing up? What if I’m not a good guardian?”
She’s silent a moment, her rhythmic breathing the only sound. “I’m going to let you in on a little parenting secret.”
I hold the phone closer to my ear so I don’t miss a thing.
“None of us know what the fuck we’re doing.”
The laugh that explodes from me can probably be heard in Hawaii. Tears of relief spring to my eyes with my mother’s validation.
“You’re doing a good job. I’ve seen you with that boy. If you feel like you’re screwing up, you’re doing it right.”
My chest aches with affection for her and for my brother. “Thanks, Mom.”
“Of course. That’s what I’m here for. So.” She changes the subject. “What’s going on with you and Millie? Has she gotten over herjet lag?” She emphasizes the last part. My mom was sorely disappointed about Millie’s absence when we stopped by shortly after we returned.
“She’s coming over later. She was remarkable with Kane this afternoon.”
“They seem like they have a special bond.”
Pride and gratitude flood my veins. “They do.”
