She’s quiet, and I can feel her thumb brushing over the rough fabric of my jeans. “The truth,” she whispers.
Anxiety thrums through my body. I notice her biting her lip and I’m sure she has a million thoughts running through her mind like I do.
“I want you to stay here,” I mutter so quietly that I wonder if she heard me.
Her thumb stops moving, but she doesn’t look at me. “Stay here and do what, Rowan?” she asks, her voice barely above a whisper.
“Make a life here. Open your dream bakery. Behappy.Wake up in the morning and not dread going to do something that you are supposed to love. Surround yourself with family and friends who will support you through the good and the bad.Stay, Ellie.”
She turns her body and looks up at me. Her face is slightly puffy from crying. But her eyes are bright again and are the bluest I’ve ever seen them. I watch her throat bob and wonder if what I just told her was too much.
Was I being too selfish?
She breaks the silence between us. “What aboutyou?Do you think you should be on that list of why I should stay?”
I look at her and continue to brush my hand through her hair. Her eyes shut momentarily with the comfort. Slowly, she opens them again. Her long lashes flutter when she blinks.
“Rowan,” she says, asking in question.
Before she can continue, before I lose her again, I reach down and kiss her, needing to feel her lips on mine again. I gently cup her cheeks in my hands and keep my lips on hers. I feel her touch on me, in my hair, her fingers running through it.
I tuck my arm under her, lifting her up closer to me. I lock her there. Holding one side of her cheek while my other arm is wrapped around her. I pull her in tighter, not willing myself to let her go.
I feel her tongue on my lips, and I let her in. She’s slow and lazy, just the way I like it. No rush, just enjoying each other, the taste of each other. I feel her fingers against the scruff of my jaw, and it sends electricity through my body.
I let myself bite her lip softly, a moan slipping through her lips and onto mine. I’m going to let myself have her right now. Because I don’t know if I will be lucky enough to have her again like this.
I’m going to make hermine.
forty-two
ELLIE
His lips pressinto mine unexpectedly, but I take every ounce of him in. The warmth of his smooth lips, the way his tongue sweeps against mine as we play with each other. I can feel my body arching into him, wanting to straddle him and take over.
But I’m not going to. I’ve only ever experienced this side of Rowan once, and I want to explore that part of him more. So, I do. I let him take charge. I let him do what he wants with me.
He nips at my bottom lip, surprising me with his tongue again, and my mind goes back to that night in the bedroom and how his tongue felt on me. My legs have a mind of their own, and I end up straddling him. I place my hands on each side of his shoulder, lifting myself up but not letting my lips leave him, and start to grind on him.
His large hands slide up my thighs and cup my ass, helping me move on top of him. I let a whimper of a moan release from my mouth and into his, which in turn makes him let out a low groan. I miss the feeling of him like this. Miss how he feels against me while I move on top of him through our clothes.
His fingers grab into my ass, and my hands slide up into his hair, gently tugging at it. I want to see how far he will let me go, let me set myself free and wild. I want to learn what he’s learned throughout the years of us being apart.
I was brought back here because of work and my ex, but I like to think that I was really brought back here for Rowan. To come back to him. To realize the potential we could have and not waste any more years on it.
“Let me take you to the bedroom,” he says between kisses.
I push myself full up while he keeps his hands on me, both of our chests rising and falling, panting. I can feel how hard he is under me, and I swear to God, my body shivers. Itshivers.He presses himself into me, and I let out a sharp gasp.
I show him a devilish smile because even though this is the hottest moment I’ve ever had in my life; I can’t resist playing childish games with him.
I wink at him and quickly push myself off. “First one in the room gets to call the shots.”
“Oh, you do not know what you’ve just done.”
Just as quickly as I move, he’s moved faster. He grabs my waist and playfully tosses me back on the couch while he runs to the room. I jump off the couch and run after him.
“Shit,” Rowan shouts when his socks slip on the freshly polished wooden floors. He grabs the wall to catch his fall.
