I get up from the couch, go to Addie, and take her into my arms for a hug. The little sister I never had.
“You need to let me and Rowan figure this out on our own, okay? And when it comes to Charlie.” I look around at the three of them. “Being home has made me realize that I do deserve better than that. But Rowan needs to realize that he deserves better when it comes to the situation with his dad. I think once he figures that out, he won’t be so scared to take what he wants.”
And I want that to be me.
“I punched him in the arm for you,” Addie mutters.
I laugh. “Thank you.” I let out a sigh and looked at them. “Look, I will talk to him tomorrow. I’ll talk to him, and we can navigate things. Whether that’s us trying things out again or not. I will always love Rowan. I don’t know if he knows that, but he’s never left my heart. He was my first everything, and I’m happy that I was able to have him when I did.”
Riley places her hands on her chest, a small frown appearing on her lips.
“I’m sorry,” Addie says, hugging me again.
“It’s okay.” I pull away. “I need to get going. I need to make the stupid dessert that I agreed to do for Mrs. Anderson. Wish me luck.” I salute them with two fingers.
“You’re going to kick ass,” Hailey shouts as I walk through the door.
* * *
I wrap my hair up after changing into comfortable clothes for the night. I breathe out a heavy sigh while I place my hands on my hips, looking at the kitchen in front of me. It never used to be like this. I never had to drag myself when it came to baking.
I was always in the kitchen on my own accord, testing new recipes, calling out for Mom, Dad, and August to taste test. Every time they smiled and told me how amazing it was, I felt like I accomplished something. Making people happy. It’s all I wanted.
I walk into the kitchen and look at everything I need displayed on the table. A simple dessert containing graham cracker crumbs, sugar, butter, peanut butter, and chocolate chips. At least it isn’t 800 crème brûlées.
I grab my phone and select the playlist I made for baking. I haven’t listened to it in almost two years. All the songs were upbeat and always put me in a good mood. I hesitate to push play, nervous about how I’ll feel once I hear the first track.
I hope it’s not a trauma response because that would absolutely suck.
I hit play, and the sound of a piano quickly starts, and then the voices of two women start to sing together.Dancing Queenby Abba blares from the Bluetooth speaker. I feel my toes move to the beat of the song.
A small smile forms on my lips, and I feel myself shift to a lighter mood. I’m ready.
thirty-three
ROWAN
“Mom,Aunt Rosey, you’ve outdone yourselves again. The food issogood,” Addie says as she takes another bite of the twice-baked potato that was seasoned to perfection.
It was the best comfort food that I could have asked for. Mom made her famous baked macaroni and cheese, Aunt Rosey handled the rotisserie chicken, Addie made homemade mashed potatoes, and I grilled vegetables with garlic seasoning.
“So, you two, how has work been? I heard about the merchandise mishap a few weeks ago. I forgot to ask you about it,” Mom asks while spearing her asparagus.
“Iwas able to handle it just fine.” Addie glances at me. “Everything was fixed within the same week. I was able to get half the money back while still receiving the correct items,andthey gave us a fifty percent discount for our next large order.” She angles her head at me with a smile.
“Now that’s how you get shit done,” Aunt Rosey replies, pointing a fork at us.
“If Rowan could only trust me enough to do my job, he wouldn’t have had to rip out his hair.” She continues to look at me.
I take another bite of the chicken and down it with Mom's fresh lemonade. I continue to look down at my food, smiling to myself.
“Well, I’m proud of you for letting your sister handle things, Ro.” My mom bumps her elbow into mine.
Addie smiles. “It took a lot of nagging to get what I wanted, but it worked.”
“I know, I know,” I reply in self-defeat, raising my hands in surrender. “I’m sorry for not trusting you to control the situation to begin with. It’s a huge flaw of mine to try to do everything myself, not let anything bad happen.”
“If you keep trying to control everything in your life, you are going to have a miserable time,” Aunt Rosey tells me.
