A relieved breath leaves me when she finally walks inside.
I wait until I hear her bedroom door lock before grabbing my pillow and comforter. I press my ear to the door, listening to her move around, not daring to move a muscle until she finally settles into bed.
I count to ten to make sure she won’t come out swinging with a dagger before carefully opening my door. My steps are silent as I cross the hallway and set up my pathetic excuse for a bed outside her door.
I scratch the back of my head, grimacing at the pitiful setup.
Fates, it’s so embarrassing doing this every night. I feel like a fucking creep, but my stubborn siren has left me no choice. Shebarely looks at me during the day, and there’s only so much a man’s heart can take before the hurt makes it hard to breathe.
Before I started sleeping outside Hazel’s door like a lovesick idiot, my Divine was driving me to the brink of insanity. The ache in my chest got unbearable until I wanted to rip my heart out to get a single moment of peace. I knew being near my mate was the only thing that would settle my Divine enough to stop tearing my insides with raw need for her.
I rest my head against her door with a sigh, bracing for another night on the cold, hard floor before I’d have to wake up at the ass crack of dawn and slip back into my room so Hazel wouldn’t see me.
A sharp pain in my chest jolts me awake. The hair on the back of my neck rises, my instincts screaming that something is wrong. I whip my head around… and that’s when I hear it. A choked gasp. Footsteps pacing on the other side of the door.
Why is she awake at this hour?
Hazel is mumbling under her breath, too low to make out, but I can feel her panic crawling up my throat. I feel her fear in my bones, and I’m on my feet instantly, ready to knock, but then I feel her moving in my direction, and I lose my bravery.
Hazel will skin me alive if she finds out I’ve been sleeping out here, so I snatch my pillow and blanket and rush back to my room.I’ve barely shut the door when I feel her presence outside.
Did she find out? Is that what spooked her?
Her ragged breathing gets worse, twisting something sharp in my chest. I wait for her to knock, to finally come to me for a change, to tell me what’s wrong, but nothing happens.
Hazel, please… just knock once.
I count the seconds, hoping—praying—for a signal so I can throw the door open and pull her in. I want to help her with whatever she’s fighting, but minutes pass, and she still doesn’t knock.
Fuck.
I’m done waiting. I throw caution to the wind and crack the door open, and my heart drops at the sight of her walking away.
My grip tightens on the knob when she stumbles, barely keeping herself upright, but she still doesn’t come to me. Her breathing is uneven, her hands shaking as she walks past her room and heads downstairs.
She’s walking away from me. Again. Like I was never an option. She’s in pain, scared, and I’m an idiot for thinking she’d come tomefor comfort.
I don’t think before following her. As I pass her room, I glance inside, searching for what could’ve rattled her, but everything looks untouched.
Hazel doesn’t stop until she reaches the Horsemen castle. Herrealhome. The place she feels safest.
I ignore yet another crack in our foundation and follow her. My heart pounds in my head, but I’m careful not to make a single sound. Even if I did, Hazel is too lost in her head to notice.
She’s never this careless. She’s always alert, if a little paranoid.
Is there a security threat? Is that why she’s scared? But then why didn’t she come to me when I was right next door?
I stop around the corner when she reaches Nevaeh and Anxo’s room and knocks, the sound slicing through the unnerving silence.
The moment Nevaeh sees my mate, her eyes widen in horror before she pulls her inside.
Did I miss something? Is she hurt?
I couldn’t see her face, but if she were hurt or bleeding, she wouldn’t walk all the way over here instead of coming to me first, right? I trace our steps back, and my shoulders slump when I don’t find any blood.
Fates, why is this so fucking complicated? I hate feeling like I don’t know my mate’s heart, hate knowing I’m not her safe space, hate being the last person to know when she’s in trouble.
When I return to Nevaeh’s room, the room is slightly ajar, and I can’t stop myself from moving closer. It takes a second for my eyes to adjust to the dark before I find Hazel lying beside Nevaeh. Her head rests on the edge of Nevaeh’s pillow, forehead tucked into my daughter’s shoulder. She’s clutching Nevaeh’s arm like a lifeline as her eyes fall shut.
