Me:He’s a calico. I’m surprised you haven’t noticed him holding court in my front window. It’s one of his favorite spots.
There were a few more moments before he replied.
Nash:Now that I see him, I recall a cat sitting in the window from time to time.
Nash:Name?
Me:Mr. Beans. Cat toes, you know. People call them toe beans.
Nash:Now that’s a name.
I gave his comment a thumbs-up.
Nash:I’m about to walk into work, but perhaps tonight we can text a little?
Nash:No pressure.
His soft approach was appreciated. My inner scared child liked it.
Me:Yeah, I can do that.
Nash hearted my comment.
I switched back to my conversation with Betty, but there wasn’t a reply. I almost felt disappointed. Pressing her number at the top of the screen, I added her to my contacts.
Christ on a cracker,three contacts?
I was officially interacting with more people than animals, and I felt good about that. Who was this new Sybil?
I’d never be an extrovert like Bee, but I liked the thought of being an introverted person who could stillbreak out of their shell. The desire to test my boundaries was blooming. Something about it felt right.
Grabbing my latte, I took Bill to the garden. Mr. Beans followed, hopping into my lap as I sat in a chair near my pots. He curled up and together we watched as the bees flitted from flower to flower, gathering the last bit of pollen before hunkering down somewhere for the winter.
I sipped from my cup a few times, thinking I could get used to waking up like this. I’d grown so comfortable being alone, I almost forgot what it was like having people to talk to first thing in the morning.
When I lived with Cat, we’d talk in the morning, and it felt as though my day would start. Living alone, it was easy to lose track of time, having only myself to depend on. While each phase of my life had been part of my healing, it was becoming clear to me that perhaps I had a preference.
It hit me all at once, but with certainty. Living alone wasn’t as great as it used to be. I was almost shocked by this realization. It’s not that I’d changed so much as my opportunities had, and that made all the difference.
I acted fine because I didn’t see any other way. I was too stubborn to admit that I was struggling. Part of me didn’t want to face the unsettling thought that I needed others. Painful as it may be, I had to let myself make friends.
CHAPTER 15
Nash
Sinking into the leather chair in my home office was a relief after the past few weeks. I’d brought it all on myself. Stealing the PERL and pretending to “help” with the investigation created way more problems than I’d expected. I couldn’t bring myself to regret it, though. If I hadn’t been out on the street that night, I might never have met Sybil.
My chin was resting on my knuckles, thumb grazing over my bottom lip while my other hand cradled a glass of Scotch. I was looking out across the street as I did most nights lately—for one reason specifically.
The lights were on at Sybil’s house.
She couldn’t possibly realize how easily I could see her move about from my office perch. For how shy she was, she wouldn’t allow it on purpose. The trees were justshort enough from this angle, the glare on her windows minimal.
She was lying on the front room couch a few floors below me, her leg slung over the back of it. From what I could tell, she wore sleep shorts and an oversized sweatshirt, her petite, toned legs on display. Her cat was on the sill, and Bill was curled at the other end near her feet. She had a book held above her, reading.
I’d messaged her every night this week, brought her lattes and breakfast every day. At the pet store where I bought Bill his treats, I’d added ‘cat sushi’ to the order. Knowing she had a cat now, too, I wasn’t about to exclude it.
So far, I knew she loved anything baked and sweet, as I did. She clearly liked animals, did not have many friends, and liked to read—a lot. She loved baking and cooking, but also loved a good pizza. Her favorite drink was champagne, bourbon being a close second, which pleased me. I learned she loved flowers, especially roses, because the smell was so intense. She loved to sew but hadn’t really done it in a while. Cold weather was her favorite, and she loved the holidays, despite living alone.
