“Men,” she muttered. “Why their brains work so slow, I don’t know.”
My lips quirked for a moment. “It’s a lot to take in.”
“What is there to take in? It’s a baby. They’ve been around for centuries, you know.”
I stared at her. “Seriously? It’s abigdeal. Eighteen years of clothing them, feeding them, housing them.”
“Eighteen?” she asked. “You’re going on thirty and still living with me.”
“Okay, okay.” I gave her a look, knowing I helped her as much as she helped me. “But still, it’s a lot of responsibility.”
“A lot of responsibility.” She nodded. “A lot of joy. A lot of diapers. A lot of laughs. A lot of late nights and early mornings and worried thoughts and proud moments. All of it.” Her eyes twinkled. “It’s life, and it’s wonderful.” She reached across the table, holding my hands. “Your journey is just beginning.”
Her feelings were contagious. For the first time since finding out, I felt a spark of hope. “You think so?”
“Oh, honey, I know so. I don’t know what I even thought about before I had kids. I know there must have been something, but I sure can’t remember.”
I chuckled, but the joy only lasted so long. This elephant hung between us—Glamma was showing signs of her age. There were so many transitions and changes approaching us.
“What are we going to do?” I asked her. “Money’s tight as it is, and I don’t know if Bryce will want to be involved.”
“We’ll do what it takes,” she said with all the faith in the world.
“It doesn’t just take faith, Glamma,” I told her, begging her to understand. “It takes work and sacrifice andmoney.”
She stood up, hands on the table. “Here’s what I know. Your grandpa and I hardly had two nickels to rub together and raised an amazing young woman who never had to stress for food, water, shelter, clothes, orlove. Maybe the numbers didn’t make sense, but it all worked out in the end. Now,youcan stress aboutmoney all night, butI’mgoing to go thank God for my new great-grandbaby.” She swept from the living room. “Good night.” Her door slammed shut.
Shifting my chair back, I leaned over and rested my head on the cool wood of the table. That had gone better than I had hoped, but I was still left wondering how on earth this was ever going to work.
40.Jada
Saturday morningafter eating a buffet-style breakfast with Glamma—because she insisted I was eating for two—I loaded up her returns and left for the bus stop for my bartending job. I hated that even the bus stop reminded me of Bryce and the day he pulled up, insisting I ride with him.
I hadn’t known him all that long, and already I saw him everywhere.
The bus rumbled up, and I climbed on, tapping my bus pass to the sensor as I went. I sat down and looked around, seeing a mix of people on board. One mother held a baby to her chest, nursing with a little blanket for privacy. The woman looked exhausted, and she leaned her head back on the seat, eyes closed.
Would that be me in just a few months?
I’d have to figure something out for childcare during my bartending shifts–I couldn't exactly be mixing drinks while wearing a baby on my chest. The question of what I’d do about childcare wouldn’t leave my thoughts throughout my shift.
My child would have free care while I worked at the daycare, but the extra money my bartending work brought in wouldespecially be needed for things like diapers and wipes. Although I hated to admit it, Glamma wouldn’t be up to watching a baby for several hours at a time. Maybe I could find a new, more childfriendly job.
Add that to my list… Along with these returns.
After my shift, I went back to the bus to catch the one that would bring me closest to the boutique.
Riding the bus wasn’t the most convenient way to the boutique since I still had to walk about fifteen minutes from the closest bus stop, but it gave me time to clear my head and think.
Maybe next year I could get a new teaching job so at least I wouldn’t have to worry about babysitting over the summer. Glamma’s friends at church were sure to know some people who could babysit for me, maybe without me paying an arm and a leg. Those ladies probably knew people with baby clothes and items to give away too.
And we would have to budget. Even though Glamma loved her shopping, I’d just tell her that it was time to set a budget. I’d heard good things about using cash envelopes. I could learn more about cooking on a budget and take on the grocery shopping.
Even though the father didn’t want to be involved, maybe I could get the courts to require a paternity test and child support. Although, from things my friends had said through the years, men could practically get away with anything.
The weight of it all was so much that my chest felt tight as I walked into the boutique. I hardly noticed the renovations they were doing out front, but standing at the front register, I could tell they were updating the signage.
The same woman I usually saw working there with the big blond hair and dark eyeliner noticed me looking at the changes. “We’ve been bought out.”
