"This…" I motion around us. "I mean being here. Obviously, we cannot stay in this dead kingdom forever, especially with the current circumstances. We will need to go back to our royal duties eventually, before someone eventually forces our hand. And then what?"
"Then you will assist me in unseating my father from his throne and—"
I let out a growl of frustration.
The prince gives me a puzzled look. "What?"
"That is all? I get to experience all of this and then I just go back to being a pawn?" Tears prick at my eyes.
"You are destined to play a pawn. Although this respite from doing so actively has been quite entertaining for the both of us, we still have to play out our individual games. That shouldn’t bother you. It is not like it is a surprise. I have warned you from the very beginning."
"I do not know. I think it is amazing how much I have been able to learn here. I mean I can command fire and summon creatures!" I let a little flame spark to life in my hand. "I have a rudimentary knowledge of potions, and I can even take down Sam at least once a training session." I let the flame die."But what is it all for? So that I can be more powerful for those who use me in the future? More powerful for you? Or so that on the off chance I get recaptured those who need me to play in their games have inside protection on their asset?" I choke back a sob. "Being capable and…" I search for the words. "Independently someone, apart from my kingdom, apart from stifling responsibilities, and even apart from Sorin and Sam's constant protection is invigorating. I thought that just going out on a couple of adventures in the woods with those two would be the height of my existence, but this?" I let the flame spark up once again. "This is so much more. Or it can be, if I can let it grow." The flame grows in my palm, before I once again snuff it out. I stare at the empty space. "If after all of this I am forced to go back, forced to continue to play that pawn you are so great at reminding me I am, then I do not know how I will survive it. I do not know if I can survive it and that thought frightens me to my core. Do you not feel the same?" I look at the prince, his still form taking up the frame of the bathroom. "Has this experience shown you nothing? Shown you that we can be so much more than-"
"We cannot." The prince's face goes dark. "We cannot, Alaceandra. If we do not play our parts everyone loses. You will lose. This power that you harbor... If it goes uncontrolled…" He closes his eyes and takes a breath, and I feel like my world is shattering beneath me.
"You are right. Sorry." I wipe my tears. "We should meet back up with Sorin and Sam. It is dinner time." I smile at him weakly.
"Alaceandra-"
"It is fine. They will be missing us soon. We should go."
The prince grunts in frustration. "Fine, but we should take the food to them. We all need to talk."
I nod and head down the ladder, leaving Baldar to nap on the couch.
Chapter fifty-six
Stew
Alaceandra
We enter the kitchen to find Sylvie mixing a stew, three little purple bottles sit next to chopped veggies and meats to her right. When she notices us, she turns.
"Oh! I am almost done! Is it dinner already?" She fidgets with a cloth tucked in her pants.
"Oh no! Sorry I did not realize we were early. We were thinking of maybe taking some food and eating with the others in their cottage. Would that be alright with you?"
"Sure, sweetie." Her smile is twitchy and she is avoiding our eyes. "Just give me a couple more moments to finish up. Feel free to sit at the table."
"Okay…" I hesitate. "Are you doing alright Sylvie?"
"Me?" She busies herself with the food, but her movements are slightly off somehow. More robotic, instead of their usual fluidity. "Um, yes." She clears her throat. "Well, no I guess not." She turns back towards us. "Hayford and Lyza left last night and have not made it back."
"What?" The prince says. "Sylvie you should have-"
"No, no. I did not want to worry you all with it. You seem really busy, and she is with her father, I just—" she sighs. "I think I know where they are now."
"Where are they?" The prince demands.
Sylvie smiles, but it is one filled with grief and turns jerkily back to the food. "It matters not. I know how to get them back I just—" She sighs.
"Sylvie?" The prince questions. She stays quiet for a moment and continues stirring the pot of food. "Please tell us Sylvie we want to help."
"Let's not discuss this tonight," she says, her voice hollow. "I do not want to burden you all with my bad mood. " She grabs some bowls and places them on a small tray before scooping soup into each one. She hands it to the prince. He stares at her and her shoulders drop. "I promise I will tell you tomorrow… I just need time. Please?"
He nods. "Tomorrow."
She nods and turns back to the soup.
