After killing the engine, I hopped out of the pickup. “Yeah, everything’s good. I just thought I’d swing by to see how the house is coming along. Feels like I haven’t been out here in forever.”
“You haven’t,” he pointed out as we started walking toward the house. “But that’s okay. I’m really happy with the progress we’ve made.”
“What do you plan to do with the house once it’s finished?” I’d always kind of wondered what Jake needed a guest house for. He wasn’t close with his family, and the rental market in Silver Creek wasn’t exactly booming.
He shrugged. “I dunno. Rent it out as an Airbnb or something.”
“To who?” I laughed.
“There’s always people passing through looking for places to stay. Market it the right way, and it’ll be fine. I can see the description now.” He waved his hand in front of his face as though imagining something. “Quaint guest house on a Montana ranch. A quiet sanctuary to find solace. Eh? Eh?”
I snorted. “Let me know how that goes.”
“What’s the real reason you came over here?” He raised his brows at me.
My shoulders drooped as I released a sigh. “Sierra said something last night that I haven’t been able to get past.”
Jake tilted his head and flashed his palm in a request to continue. “Care to elaborate?”
“She had a nightmare, and I knew she wouldn’t be able to fall back asleep without something to distract her, so I suggested we go on a drive. I was stupid and asked her what her dream was about, and she disappeared into her head for a bit. When she came back to me, she was crying. I told her it was okay to cry and she said it’s not because itwas all her fault,” I explained as quickly as possible, leaving out the part about the sweatshirt and the song and everything else about last night.
“What was her fault?”
“That’s what I’m confused about. I have no idea.”
Jake looked like he was debating what to say, ultimately swallowing and biting the bullet. “What exactly happened with you two?”
I blew a raspberry. “Depends on how much time you have.”
“As much time as you need, brother. If it makes it easier, you can help me do some work on the house.”
“Ah, so you’re hoping to get some free labor out of me, is that it?” I teased.
He rolled his eyes. “Forget I mentioned it. But you’ve never talked about Sierra before. Something had to have happened.”
So, we were really doing this.
“Sierra and I were best friends. She moved to Goldfinch our freshman year of high school, and she was…shy.”
“Really?” His eyes widened as he interrupted me.
“Guarded is maybe a better word for it. But she opened up as we grew older, and I…” My eyes shifted to the ground as I kicked around the dirt with my boot. “I loved her. I still love her, but things happened and it’s not my place to say, but she’s gone through a lot of pain in her life. I wouldn’t wish what happened to her on my worst enemy. Anyway, I didn’t see her for two years after I graduated high school. We reconnected while I was in college, but right when I thought maybe she was back, that maybe the girl I loved hadn’t disappeared, she was gone without a word.”
Jake blew out a puff of breath. “Damn, dude.”
Scrubbing my hand across my chin, I nodded, lips drawn into a thin line. “Yeah.”
“Have you told her how you feel?”
My hand moved up to my forehead, and I rubbed the skin above my eyebrows as I shook my head. “When she first moved in, she told me she wanted to start over. To be friends. I don’t want to ruin whatever it is we have. Not when I have her back again. I-I don’t want to lose her again. I can’t lose her again.”
“I’m not sure I’m the right person to be asking for advice.” He forced out a laugh. “But I really think you’re going to have to tell her how you feel. Imagine you don’t and once she gets her trailer situation figured out she does leave. Are you comfortable with the idea of watching her fall in love with someone else? Are you willing to watch her move on, and are you going to be able to move on too?”
Fuck.
“That’s probably one of the smartest things you’ve ever said to me. I kinda hate it.” I laughed, but there was no humor in it. “I don’t want to move on. I don’t wantherto move on. She’s my one and only love, I’m sure of it. And I want to be hers, too. I just don’t know how to say it.”
He didn’t offer me any more advice, having said what he needed to say, but he patted me on the back anyway. “I’m sure you’ll figure it out. You always do.”
