We’re a tangled mess of satisfied limbs when the credits start to roll on the screen. I kiss Viv’s shoulder and tug the blankets up around us.
Hours later, I wake up with Viv’s body draped across mine. The sky is still dark, and she’s the sexiest blanket in the whole damn world. I want to stroke her back, kiss her temple. I want to bring her body to life like I did just a few hours ago, but I don’t dare disturb her. Because here, in the middle of the night, in the darkness of my room, I can pretend she’s mine. I can let myself believe—even for a few moments—that she loves me the way I love her.
23
Viv
It’s only my second time in Las Vegas, but I already love the city. The lights, the sound, the energy. It’s such a vibe. Of course, my good mood could also be due to the fact that I’m here to watch Bainbridge Men’s Hockey take home another national title.
Since the first game isn’t until tomorrow, I’m hanging with the wives and girlfriends, killing time, drinking fruity beverages, and playing slots. It’s the most fun outside Mickey’s bedroom or his car than I ‘ve had in way too long.
Maybe we’ve been spending a little too much time together. I know that’s what everybody’s worried about. And maybe we are way too wrapped up in each other, but I can’t stress over other people’s opinions. I learned that lesson a long time ago. Besides, tonight’s a girls’ night, we’re all looking hot as hell, and we are in search of the luckiest slot machine in this place..
“Found one!”
I look over to see Bridgette standing next to an old-timey slot machine and waving me over. I head in that direction, Maggie, Fallon, Mel, and Josie following right behind me. Fallon settles into the hot seat first, but comes up empty. It’s the same forMaggie, Josie, and Mel. We take turns losing money, so we order more girlie cocktails to soften the blow.
“I’m so bad at these things, but I just keep playing them,” Bridgette says, giggling. “I think I just like pulling the handle and watching everything spin.”
“Yeah, I don’t think I can watch the spinny stuff anymore,” Josie says, rubbing her temples. “And I’m not sure I can feel my nose."
“Well, I am sure you need some water,” her best friend, Mel, says, flagging down a waiter.
Beside me, Maggie yawns and stretches, and I can’t help but laugh. “Girl, it’s not even midnight,” I tell her. “And you have a baby. Doesn’t that mean you’re used to staying up all night?”
“Only when she’s cutting a tooth,” Maggie explains. “I really should head upstairs soon. I know she’s in good hands with Aunt Jules, but I want to check in on my sweet baby girl before I crawl into bed.”
“We’re ready to call it a night, too,” Mel says, slinging an arm around Josie. “We’ve got to scream our asses off tomorrow, so we better get some rest.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right,” Bridgette says, stifling a yawn before she looks over at me. “But what do you say, Viv? One more try?”
I love this girl. She’s a lot more straitlaced than her sexy-as-sin brother, but she’s got an adventurous streak, too. “Hell, yeah,” I answer. We feed the machines and pull the levers, even though the screen is fully digital now.
This place is a hive of activity right now, but we’re not paying attention to any of the other gamblers or thrill seekers. We are locked in on these penny slots like we’re about to win it all at a poker championship or something. Yeah, it’s silly, but it’s so much fun.
“Womp, womp,” Bridgette says, laughing as she realizes she’s lost again.
I’m ready for a similar fate, but then my screen starts flashing, and I realize this is different from the other times I’ve played.
“Holy fuckballs,” Maggie says, adopting Mickey’s favorite phrase and letting out a whoop. “You’re a freaking winner, Viv!”
I chance a look at the screen, and sure enough, I’ve just won five hundred bucks. Holy fuckballs, indeed.
“Girl, it’s clearly your lucky night,” Mel says, practically vibrating with excitement. “You should go buy a ring and make an honest man out of Mickey.”
“How freaking adorable would another Vegas wedding be?” Josie says beside her, and I can’t tell if Coach Van’s fiancee looks thrilled or like she might burst into tears of joy at any moment. Possibly both.
But I’m already shaking my head and shutting down this wild idea. They might just be teasing me, but I know this crew well enough to know they can make an unhinged scenario happen at a moment’s notice. “I’m pretty sure Maggie’s uncle would freak if I dragged Mickey out of bed right now for any reason,” I say.
We all laugh because it’s true, but inside I’m going a little crazy. Why is everyone constantly shipping Mickey and me? And yes, I get it on some level. We’re hooking up and we spend all of our time together. To them, that makes us a couple. But we’re not. I’ve said it a thousand times, but I’m not sure anyone has heard me. We are just besties with bennies, and that works perfectly fine for us. Yes, everyone else is out here living in a freaking fairy tale, but I’m not built that way.
The thing they don’t understand, though, is that I wish I was. I want to be brave. I want to be fearless. I want to tell Mickey that when we’re together, I’m not pretending. And I’m not just having fun. I’m falling in love with my best friend. But life hastaught me that there’s a fine line between being brave and being foolish. I’m not risking this. I’m not ruining this. I’m not going to let him love me just so I can wait for him to break my heart. Because that’s the thing nobody realizes. The tough girls? The badasses? Our hearts are fragile, too.
24
Mickey
We’re in Vegas, baby. It’s freaking unreal to be vying for a national title for the third year in a row. The loss we suffered here at this same tournament freshman year felt like somebody ripped my heart out of my chest and stomped all the fuck over it. Last year’s victory was so damn sweet. But this year? We’ve got something to prove.
