“What do you mean?” Felix grabs a stool from one of the workbenches, hauls it over to the desk, and takes a seat next to me. His legs are spread wide as he plants his sock covered heels on the bottom riser. Grayson is now the only one fully standing. He’s on the opposite side of the desk, but there doesn’t seem to be the same wall between us as there was when we entered the room—that is until I remember him and Julia standing out front.
I avert my gaze from him and answer Felix. “He thinks his skull was crushed by an object, not magic.”
“Like what, a car?” Remy snorts.
“We’re still trying to sort out if there was magic enhancement used.”
Remy whistles. “That’s dangerous shit.” He would know, considering he plays professional sports. The councils outlawed anything beyond glamor when it comes to body mods. You can look like a guy who can bench press a house, but there’s no actual strength behind the visage.
It doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. It’s just risky. Enhancement spells can get your magic stripped. Guys like Remy and his teammates are tested for stuff like that all the time. Hell, even the public has to go through a nullifier to get into an arena. It also means people can’t hex or curse any of the players. Fans can get heated at events, so the nullifier ensures no one does anything they would regret the next day or cause them to land in prison or worse.
“It does look like there was something there, the outline is just too perfect.” Felix continues to search the picture.
“Think you could give me a ride over so I can check it out in person and see if I can sort out what was there?” I’m looking directly at Felix, but it’s Remy who answers.
“Sure. Do you need to let the chief know?”
“Actually…” I draw out the word while I gather up all the papers they printed for me and stack them up. “He asked me to meet him there at six. We should probably talk before I head out. That way you can just drop me off at the library, and I’ll be out of your hair.” I try for a smile, but it’s forced. I don’t drink that often, but I have the urge to down a bottle of vodka right now.
“You think we can settle our differences in—” Remy looks down at a heavy watch on his wrist. “A couple hours, give or take?” His dark brows are high on his forehead, showing me just how doubtful he thinks the idea is.
“I’m ready to listen to what you have to say,” I answer, even though it’s the last thing I want to do.
The hard glint returns to Grayson’s eyes, and he crosses his arms over his chest. Everything in his posture just shifted, and it makes me want to lower my gaze. I hold fast and pretend not to notice, but I know I’m about two seconds away from him railing into me. I hope I really am ready for this.
Chapter 14
My patience was tested. It came back negative.
Before Grayson can say anything, Felix asks, “Why don’t you tell us why you left? Why you really left?”
I open my mouth to give him an immediate response, but I stop myself from saying the same thing I’ve already said more than once—or alluded to anyway. I close my lips and take a moment to really think about an answer that might satisfy them and myself once and for all.
I’ve thought about the moment I made the split decision to leave a hundred times. I regretted it the moment the thought formed in my head, but I didn’t know the consequences it would cause.
I look down at the desk, because I can’t bear to see them while I hand over what feels like the last piece of me, but in truth, they already owned it. I’ve just been holding onto it. “I’m not going to lie and say I didn’t take the ritual seriously, because that would just be an insult to all of us, but what I will say is that I should have taken itmoreseriously. I can’t believe I thought it was a good idea to bind us like that when we were so young.” I shake my head, remembering how selfish I was being. It’s not that I didn’t want to be imprinted to them, I’m just not sure if it was for the right reasons.
“I was terrified of losing you, any of you.” I finally look up and glance at all three of them. Grayson’s brows are furrowed deeply, while Felix is watching me with what looks like understanding in his eyes.
“Yet you stopped the ritual right before finishing it.” Remy snorts, making sure I hear his skepticism.
I nod once and swallow, lowering my eyes back to the desk. “I wasn’t the only one questioning if it was the right thing to do. The moment we cast the circle, I could feel all of your magic and emotions.” It shouldn’t be a surprise to them, though it may be to others who don’t know me so well. I can’t just read a magical signature. If the emotions that drive the magic are strong or if I have a personal connection, like I do with all three of them, then I can feel it. We formed a bond well before that night, and no ritual was required for me to sense we all had reservations about what I was about to do.
“And?” Remy prompts.
“And I wasn’t the only one who was worried about the outcome,” I snap defensively.
“Of course we were worried,” Grayson scoffs, “but none of us cut and ran like you did!”
I plant both of my balled up fists on the desk. Patience isn’t my strong suit, but I call upon what little I have. My words are spoken through my teeth. “I didn’t cut and run—”
“That’s sure what it seems like to me,” Grayson challenges before I can finish.
“That night, I was a little overwhelmed, to say the least.” I slide my hair behind my shoulder. “I told you I needed some time.”
“I don’t think any of us expected it to be years,” Felix chimes in.
“Neither did I.” I look him dead in the eye. “Imagine my surprise when I found out none of you came to see me the next day, but you were withTiffany.” I can’t even say her name without sneering it.
