Jet
My parents disappeared immediately,and it took an hour to figure out what in the hell was going on, which I only managed through messages with my brother. Mom had accepted a last-minute speaking gig in the city, and the two of them decided to surprise Noah at the new firm for his birthday.
Not the family reunion they expected.
I couldn’t fucking believe it. After so many years, the first time they saw me, I was buried in another man’s ass.
It would almost be funny. I let go of them a long time ago, and I had no interest in rebuilding a relationship with two people who had proven they could do nothing but hurt me. Bridge burned. So shocking them was nearly entertaining, in a twisted, juvenile way, an immature impulse like the one that made me stir shit up in high school just to show them how mad I was.
Except, when I saw their faces, something inside of me just hurt. They were my fucking parents, after all.
And I might have just provided all the evidence my brother would need to kick my ass to the curb again. Honestly, could I even blame him? Peyton had told me that Noah valued consistency, and I’d just proven how much of a mess I was, all over again.
At least Peyton was sweet about it. The second our parents left, he tried to run after them for me. He would have stayed with me all night, just to keep me company. He offered enough times. But my head was reeling from the whole thing, and I felt scared to turn to the rock I was so used to holding.
Everything was on the verge of collapsing. I couldn’t fucking need him, not now, not when I might be about to lose him.
So after cleaning up the office, I forced myself to say goodbye to Peyton. Noah and I planned to meet up later to talk, so I needed to try to clear my head anyway.
But first, Peyton and I lingered downstairs, right on the street. He had that same steady, determined look on his face that I was used to, the expression that made me want to hold him close. He promised me that we’d find a way through this and that he wasn’t going to abandon me, but it was like I couldn’t hear the words. I couldn’t even accept his final offer to stay with me, even though I wanted his company so bad it hurt.
A childhood of pain and rejection had come screeching back to life, drowning me all over again. Instead of blowing the whole thing up, though, or running away, I managed to barely hold myself together. I offered Peyton a quick kiss, avoiding his eyes. “We’ll talk once this settles, right?” I asked him.
“Right,” he agreed, but I could see he was just as confused as I was. “I’ll be thinking of you, Jet.”
“Yeah,” I said with a raspy voice. “I’ll be thinking of you, too.”
I finally headed home, my gym bag still sitting on the kitchen table where I had dumped it in a rush earlier, and took a long shower.
Fuck. This was why I didn’t let myself get close to people. I hated being such a fucking letdown, and I hated that I had just brought a fresh wave of parental chaos and judgment to Noah’s life. That was exactly what I did as a teenager, and now I was doing it again.
My chest hurt when I thought about Peyton and the chance that I was just going to hurt him, too. I’d managed to make it months without ruining things, but now that he was living through the truth, and probably about to face blowback from my brother, it had to change the way he saw me.
Peyton would never do something like seducing a date in his office. That was my influence on the responsible guy, plain and simple.
Noah called me once he got our parents settled. I was sitting on a bench in the park by my place, watching the sun set over the city and beating myself up. He offered to come over, and I wasn’t sure if that was a good sign or not, but when he parked his car and hopped out, the look on his face clarified it for me.
My brother was pissed. Shit.
I stood and met him on the grass, the park lights just starting to flick on above us. “Noah, man, I’m so sorry about that—” I started out.
Noah held a hand up. “Seriously, Alastair?” he snapped. His blue collared shirt was untucked and unbuttoned at the top, and he had a wild look in his eyes.
I bristled at him using that name, but held it together. I’d never seen my brother angry, and I was honestly a little relieved that he wasn’t still as timid as he was as a kid, when he didn’t quite know how to stand up for himself.
“I’m sorry,” I repeated evenly, trying to stay calm, trying to pull on the integrity that Peyton had seen in me. “I really wish that hadn’t happened.”
He relaxed slightly, but sucked his lips into his mouth, still mad. “Do you know what kind of hell I’m going to have to deal with all weekend now?”
I winced. “I’m sorry.”
“And that’s not the worst of it,” he hissed at me. “Peyton…”
That one, I felt in my gut. He was going to tell me to cut it off with Peyton, and the idea made me sick.
“Don’t be mad at him,” I said.
“I’m not. I’m mad at you,” my brother said. “I’m mad for him! You’re having fun with Peyton now, but you’re going to hurt his feelings.”
