I erupted with laughter, then shook my head quickly. “Absolutely not. We stayed far away from anything like that.” I glanced around the shop, then down to my box of supplies. The job was going to take some work, but as always, I had scheduled myself more than enough time before my slot with the kiln.
“Actually, are you free?” I asked Alyssa. “I’d kind of like to talk this out with someone.”
“You know I’m right around the corner,” she answered brightly. “Cup of tea?”
* * *
Alyssa’s squat brick house in West Philly was just as cozy and warm as she was. It was filled with big comfy chairs, half-burned candles, and stacks of books, and every time I visited, I felt like I was going to float off into some relaxing alternative realty.
I pulled myself out of the daze when Alyssa deposited a couple of cups and a small pot of tea on the table. “Tell me, Grayson,” she asked. “This threesome got you worked up?”
“Something like that,” I answered. “I’m still trying to figure out how I feel about the whole thing.”
“Did you enjoy it?”
I leaned back in the armchair and remembered how many times I had paused my work to sneak into the bedroom and relive the experience. “I definitely enjoyed it,” I said. “It was electric.”
Alyssa laughed. “Go on.”
“Having both of them in my hands at the same time sent shivers across my skin. It was like I could feel every pulse and tremble in their bodies, and I was the conduit that brought us together. And when one of the guys jerked me off…” I hummed to myself. “It was clear he knew exactly what he was doing.”
“That must have been a nice surprise,” Alyssa said. “I didn’t mind teaching Claire the 101 of what it’s like to date and love a trans woman. I knew she was worth it because I knew we were right for each other. But I’ve definitely had my share of awkward experiences with old girlfriends.”
“It’s funny,” I said. “With Zoe, I was comfortable with how she and I had sex, but when I imagine myself with a gay man, it’s like I want to start over and figure myself out all over again.”
“And did you feel that way with the guys?”
I nodded, remembering how my body had started to move on its own and how the scrape of Demir’s beard against my stubble had practically rewired my brain right there. “I dropped down to my knees so fast,” I confessed, “I almost didn’t believe it myself.”
Alyssa giggled. “Definitely not the way you acted with Zoe.”
I lifted my tea and let the steam warm my face before I took a sip of the mint and honey. “And it was exciting!” I agreed. “But I don’t think that’s the kind of thing I actually want.”
“Threesomes?”
“Fast, dirty sex,” I clarified. “I’m not the kind of guy who exchanges blowjobs in some back room. I want a sweetheart I actually know and a long day in bed with no distractions.”
Alyssa nodded. “I understand. You’ve had a few relationships already, Grayson. Just because you’re still learning how to be yourself as a gay man doesn’t mean you have to toss out everything else you learned along the way.”
I sighed, then rubbed the back of my head. “I guess it was a learning experience,” I said. “I definitely felt like a changed person afterward. I’m just surprised that it’s going to end there. It was so nice hanging out with them and dancing before we hooked up. I started to think Demir and Marco could be new people in my life.”
“Demir and Marco?”
I tilted my head. “Do you know them?”
“The guys who own The Forty-Eight?”
My mouth fell open, and I placed the cup back on the table. “You do know them!”
“Not personally,” she quickly clarified. “But damn, Grayson, you really must have been hiding deeply in straight world when you were still with Zoe.”
“What do you mean?”
“Demir and Marco are the number one power couple in Philadelphia’s gay scene.” Alyssa waved her cup in the air, spilling some tea on the hardwood floor. “Seriously, Grayson, you hooked up with those two? They’re so damn hot!”
“Oh god,” I groaned. “They’re a power couple? I’m not even sure I know what that means.”
“It means they’re successful and fashionable, and every gay man in town wants to spend time with them. Hell, I’m a lesbian, and even I think they’re hot!” Alyssa pressed her hand to her chin, thinking. “And they’re friendly with trans people? That’s so great to know! Maybe I should check out The Forty-Eight one night.”
