Chapter Twenty-Seven
Clark
I woke up with Mars wrapped around my body, his chest rising and falling in his sleep. It took me a few seconds of rubbing my eyes to remember where I was, and what had happened the night before, but as I untangled myself from Mars’s embrace, it all came back.
The feeling of Rip inside of me, filling me and touching a part of my body I had never even realized existed. The tight tug and pull of Mars, grinding his butt down against my hips. The lightning that sparked across my skin as I felt each of them at once, holding me from each side.
I tugged on my briefs and T-shirt, grabbed my glasses, and then padded into the kitchen. My hole was still tender, aching, and when I pressed my hand against it, I felt that warmth again, filling me from the inside.
Rip was standing at the kitchen sink and drinking a glass of water, and when I cleared my throat to get his attention, he turned with a big smile on his face. He was wearing a pair of gray sweatpants and a zip-up blue hoodie, and his hair was still a little messy from sleep. “Morning,” he said. “Up early again?”
I shrugged, suddenly feeling a little shy as I thought about the night before. “You too.”
Rip kept that smile on his face as he stepped forward, then pressed a kiss against my forehead. I leaned into his stance, feeling the comfort of his beefy arms and chest, and just as quickly, the shyness seemed to fade away.
“How you feeling today?” he asked. “You had a big night last night.”
I nodded, then realized how tired my legs felt. I took a seat at the breakfast nook, and Rip joined me, sitting across the small table. “I’m good,” I said, thinking carefully about it. “I mean, I’m really good.” I laughed to myself as more memories of the night came rushing back. “That was amazing.”
Rip ran his tongue across his bottom lip. “Sure was.”
“I’m glad you think so.”
Rip nodded again, and I noticed the way the morning light fell against his face. “That’s a pretty explosive first time,” he said. “But you showed up like a champ. I’ve got to say, Clark, I’ve always thought you were sexy, but I never would have guessed you had that in you.”
I laughed, then pushed my glasses up on my nose. “Me either,” I said. “But once things started, it was like I had to have it.”
“Me, too,” he said with a wink. “Still, it takes a lot of trust. I hope you know, Mars and I might be more experienced, but that was special for us, too.” He paused, then seemed to think carefully for a moment. “It’s not always like that,” he chuckled.
A fantasy flickered through my mind when he said that. I imagined him talking more, telling me that I was the guy they had always been looking for and that they wanted me to stay with them, to be their boyfriend the same way Ezra, Irving, and Brick were boyfriends. But then Rip pushed his hand through his hair, and the moment passed.
“Thanks,” I said softly.
Rip tapped his fingers on the table, a cloud crossing his face. “My first time wasn’t with anyone special,” he said. “Just some guy, a few years older than me. I met him on the street, lingering outside of a dive bar, and he took me into the alley that night. I thought I was doing something exciting, something that meant I had finally accepted myself. But the second he threw the condom on the ground and walked away, I realized what I had just given him.”
An ache shot through my chest. I remembered falling asleep with both guys holding me tight the night before. I had felt so comforted. I couldn’t imagine how much it must hurt not to get that after your first time.
All those months, I had imagined Rip leading some sexy, confident life as an out gay man. But sitting there, early in the chilly morning, I realized it must be more complicated than that.
“I’m sorry you didn’t have a better experience,” I said.
Rip stared off into space a moment, then shook his head. “I was about to head downstairs to make some breakfast for Aunt Grace. Would you like to join us?’
I thought about it for a second, then nodded. I knew Mars would be asleep for a while anyway, and I definitely wasn’t prepared to leave. “Sure,” I said, “thanks.”
I snuck back into the bathroom to grab my clothes, then joined Rip as we walked downstairs. He paused at the entrance to his aunt’s house, then brushed a quick kiss against my lips- and rubbed my arms to warm me.
“My story is a good one,” I said softly.
He smiled. “I’m glad.”
Once inside, Rip headed off to wake his aunt, and I decided to make myself useful and put some coffee on. It felt funny to navigate the kitchen, and I started to fantasize about being a regular part of their life, like what it would be like if making breakfast there was just as natural as making breakfast at my own aunt’s house. But by the time Rip came back out, I had pushed those fantasies down.
It was just sex,I told myself.Don’t get confused about what it means to them.
Rip came to take a cup of coffee and casually rested a hand on my shoulder, sending a tremble of pleasure along my skin. I hummed quietly as he grabbed some eggs from the fridge, then went to work at the stove.
“Fancy seeing you here again,” his aunt said, stepping into the kitchen as she pulled her robe tight. “Although after that racket last night...”
