Chapter Twenty-One
Mars
I leaned against the wall at the back of the bar, by the dartboards and a couple empty tables. My eyes scanned the front of the place, a dive that seemed popular with older guys, mainly bears and strong men.
Clark was right. It was weird that I hadn’t been hooking up with other people. And now that Rip was exploding in front of me, I definitely needed some distraction.
I needed to feel something. Anything different. I needed to rub my cock up against another guy or feel his rough hands grabbing my body to use it. I needed to get down and fuck, so that I could stop feeling the shitty way I felt.
I lifted my beer and took a deep drink, then stepped out to cruise the bar. I cast my eyes sideways as I passed different guys, admiring the way they filled out their bodies and the cocky way they spread their arms and legs when I glanced at them.
I was used to having my pick of the bar, and Seattle didn’t seem like it was going to be any different.
I hopped on a stool, then leaned back. I wanted to pick carefully because I planned for this one to last a while.
All night, preferably.
A handsome man with a silver beard and a denim shirt stepped up, placing a beer on the counter beside me. “You look hungry,” he said.
I chuckled, then gave him a good look up and down out of the side of my eye. He was sturdy, and at fifty or so years old, he would definitely know what he was doing. “Maybe,” I said coolly.
“And pissed,” he added.
I laughed once more. “I guess that’s true.”
He nodded to the bartender. Then two shots of whiskey appeared at my side. I turned, finally facing the man all the way, and nodded.
“To getting over it,” he said as he raised his shot glass. I clinked mine with his, and then we both tapped them against the bar and swallowed the brown liquid in one gulp.
“Getting over it,” I said. “Let me tell you, he’s a hell of a one to get over.”
The man stepped forward and pressed himself between my legs. I sucked in a breath and considered him one more time. “What about now?” he said. “Care for a walk?”
I felt the warm need of a body, pressed against mine, and I craved the relief he was offering me. I could taste it on my tongue, just like I had tasted it so many times before. But for some reason, I couldn’t say yes.
“Not tonight. Maybe some other time.”
The man nodded, then walked away, back into the crowd without another word.
I sighed and leaned back against the bar. I spread my legs, adjusting the partial erection the man had left me with. And then I felt mad all over again.
“Why the hell did you act that way?” I asked, as though Rip were there to hear me. “Is that who you are?”
A door opened up front, and light flashed through the dark bar. I traced a couple of twinks with my gaze, watching as they chatted by the back wall and considering my options. And then, all of a sudden, I felt something.
Like a tugging at my ribs. Like some animal part of me had come alive.
Rip stepped through the shadows and appeared in front of me. His black leather jacket was pulled up on his shoulders, and his hair was wet from the rain and pushed back from his eyes. My breath caught in my throat when I recognized him, and when I breathed again, a tremble shot across my body.
I’d missed him. The fucker had only been out of my life for a few days, but already, I was hungry to feel his touch again.
And already, I was ready to flail my fists against his chest and scream at him for how he acted.
“You’ve got nerve,” I said, turning away, even though breaking his gaze sent a chill down my spine. “Or were you just here to yell at whatever guy I picked up? Maybe threaten him and punch some more holes in the wall?”
Rip winced. The music was thumping over the speakers, but his voice was loud and clear. “Mars,” he said. “You know I didn’t mean to act like that.”
I gripped my bottle, then pulled from my beer. “Then why? Why the fuck did you lose your temper?”
