“You’re right. He’s my friend, too.” I took in a deep breath and expelled it slowly. It was time to chill. To let someone in. Or to let me out. “I like being with you, Scott. That’s why I texted.”
Dropping his arms, he crossed to the picnic table and sat down next to me. “If you’re feeling lonely, that’s an improvement.”
“Excuse me?”
“You’ve been sliding in and out of icy detachment for a long time. It’s good to see you showing a different emotion.”
“Wow. That’s harsh.”
He grunted. “What do you want, Sara? For me to go or for me to stay?”
“Stay.” I was glad that it was night, so he couldn’t see the suspicious shininess in my eyes. Our relationship was the least complicated one I had. It was restful, connected by grief rather than strained by it. I didn’t just want him here. I needed him. “Your mood kind of sucks. Am I the reason?”
“Not the only one. I told Monica my decision.”
“How’d that go?”
“She was really upset.” His voice had deepened to a rumble. “I hate to see her cry, but it’s too late for us.”
I felt bad for her, but I’d also had a lot of experience with terrible news this past year. Knowing the whole truth made things easier. “I’m glad you didn’t give her false hope. If the two of you are done, might as well get it over with.”
He straightened abruptly. “Wow, that’s kind of cold.”
Cold?No.
I was tired of my friends misreading me. I might be blunt, but I wasn’t deliberately mean. How could they not know that? Launching off the table, I stalked a few paces away. “Could you cut me some slack? Or is it stillkick Saraweek?”
He hopped off the table, too. “I’m not attacking you. I’m trying to get you to see what you’re doing to the people who care about you.”
“What am I doing?”
“The way you treat us hurts.” When I tried to respond, he shook his head at me. “You go silent on us, Sara. You rebuff our offers of help. You lure us with kindness in one moment, then snap at us the next. It’s getting old.”
“It’s been a bad year.”
“Yes, it has. I’m sorry. They’re sorry. We’rereallysorry. And we don’t mind being here for you to lean on, but you are slapping us down instead. I thought you were getting better. The cook out on Saturday was great. But you’ve retreated again.”
“Why are you doing this now?” That wasn’t a whiny note creeping into my voice. It was just fatigue.
“You picked the time and the place.”
“What?”
“Coming to the town park after dark on your own doesn’t make sense. I know it’s probably safe, but I’m not sure you’d notice if it wasn’t. It’s like you’ve become numb to risks and don’t care what happens. You can always call me to rescue you, and I’ll do everything in my power to get to you. But you can help yourself by not diving into danger.”
I wasn’t listening to this any longer. I took off for the parking lot.
“Sara. Slow up.”
I increased my pace.
The thud of his footsteps came nearer. I was almost to my car when there was a thump and a muffled scream behind me.
I stopped and looked back.
His body was crumpled on the ground. He was panting with pain.
I ran back to him. “Scott?”
