Were some betrayals kinder than others? Bex searched his face, waiting for a shimmer of forgiveness.
Before she could find it, however, the EMT had reappeared. “Lieutenant?” he said. “Are you finished?”
Werethey?
Bex willed him to speak. To absolve her of blame.
Instead, he let go of her hands, jumped out of the ambulance, and shut the doors.
—
IT FELT LIKE IT TOOKa hundred years for Izzy to run the last five steps back to the clinic door. She forced herself to stare at the black seam that separated freedom from captivity, until a hand reached out and grabbed her by her braid, yanking her inside again.
George let go of her long enough to close and lock the door, pile the furniture back against it. “Smart gal,” George said. “If you hadn’t come back here, well, who knows how angry I might have got.”
Izzy’s head swam. She could still smell the pavement, baking in the afternoon heat. She could see the necks of all the cameras trained on her as she walked away from the clinic door. She could hear Bex’s shallow breathing as they went over each crack in the sidewalk.
What kind of idiot tastes freedom and spits it out?
She heard a groan behind her and turned to find Dr. Ward’s wound trickling blood. Izzy met George’s gaze. “Can I…?”
He nodded, and she got to her knees beside Dr. Ward, unwrapping the soaked tourniquet to replace it with a fresh one. As soon as the pressure was relaxed, blood poured from the wound. Izzy wondered how long she had before she needed to beg the shooter to let Dr. Ward get real medical attention. She had a feeling it was different from Bex; that George would see the doctor’s death not as regrettable collateral damage, but as revenge.
With quick efficiency she began to tighten the makeshift bandage again by using the Sharpie as a winding key. She secured it into place with tape. Dr. Ward groaned when she moved his limb, and she tried to distract him with banter. “You know, when I was a kid and my brother broke his arm, I just splinted it and told him to use the other one.”
“Where I grew up we were so poor we didn’t even have wood tomakea splint,” Dr. Ward said.
Izzy smiled a little. “Pretty sure I had the flu for whole year, because we couldn’t afford a trip to the pediatrician.”
“We only went to the dentist if a cavity was so bad it made you throw up.”
“And braces,” Izzy said. “They might as well have been tooth jewelry.”
Dr. Ward offered a wobbly smile. “Girl, I know what you’re doing and you can’t use my own medicine on me.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“You get me talking to distract me from what’s really happening down there with my leg.”
“You know what’s happening down there,” Izzy said.
“Yeah,” he sighed. “If it’s much longer, I could lose it.”
Izzy tried not to think about that. More important, she had to make Dr. Ward not think about that. “You talk like you’re my only patient.” She jerked her chin toward Janine, still unconscious from the blow George had given her with the butt of the gun. “Any change?”
“No,” Dr. Ward said, sobering. “I’ve been watching.”
Izzy made a small noise in the back of her throat. “Well,” she said, “I wouldn’t mind if she stays unconscious.”
Dr. Ward frowned. “Do you know I only once refused to perform an abortion?”
“Was it for a pro-life protester?” Izzy asked.
He hesitated, then shook his head. “It was a racist. A woman came in and saw me and said she preferred a white doctor. Problem was, I was the only person doing procedures that day, and she couldn’t wait any longer to have it done.”
Izzy sat back on her heels. “What happened?”
“I have no idea. Even after she decided my skin color mattered less than her getting that abortion, I said no. I was self-aware enough to know that I had to treat myself like an impaired physician. I was intoxicated with anger, the same way I would have been if I had swigged a fifth of gin. I couldn’t touch her any more than I would have touched a patient if I were drunk. What if she was uncomfortable during the procedure? She might think I was intentionally trying to cause her pain because of what she’d said. And what if there was a complication, and it reinforced her beliefs that I was less than qualified because of my skin color?” He shook his head. “Like Dr. King said:It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can keep him from lynching me, and I think that’s pretty important.”
