The fitting room may have been the same room as before, but it didn’tfeelthe same. The charge in the air had been replaced by order. It was all too neat, and it was far too quiet.
Billie gestured for her to remove her coat, taking it gently when Debra hesitated. Even though everything felt off and wrong between them, the brief contact sent the same tremor of awareness through Debra’s body.
“Shall we begin?”
Debra nodded, though her heart sat heavy in her chest.
Billie looped the measuring tape around her neck and got to work. She moved in the same manner as she usually did, but the energy behind it was different. It wasn’t tenderness now…it was discipline.
“Feet together. Shoulders back,” Billie said with a smile.
Debra obeyed. The words were what she would expect from a tailor, but the sound of them—steady and rehearsed—still twisted something inside of her. She caught Billie’s reflection in the mirror as she measured the length of her arm, her expression unreadable. The woman who, just a couple of days ago, had made her feel invincible, now looked like she was standing behind glass.
“You seem different today,” Debra said softly.
Billie focused on the task at hand, not looking up. “It’s a busy morning.”
“That’s not what I meant.”
The measuring tape stilled between Billie’s hands. Her eyes lifted to meet Debra’s in the mirror, and for a fleeting moment, her composure cracked. A tiredness, perhaps regret, slipped through. Debra suspected it was the real Billie.
“Some things are better left…uncomplicated.”
Considering this woman was known for making people feel good about themselves, Debra felt as though she had just done the complete opposite with one sentence. “You mean with people like me?”
Billie smiled weakly. “I mean everyone.” She stepped up behind Debra, the tape gliding across her shoulders. “Clothing can do a great deal,” she said as she cleared her throat. “It gives you shape and it reminds you where you begin and end. Some people forget.”
Debra watched her own reflection, the two of them framed together. Billie stood tall and certain, and Debra found herself standing straighter just by being near her. “And what does it remind you?”
Billie rested the tape at Debra’s collarbone. “That control is a luxury.”
Debra may not have understood the weight behind those words, but she certainly felt them. Before she could speak, Billie stepped away and reached for the rack of fabric hanging behind them.
“This shade,” she said, holding up a length of charcoal wool, “will suit you beautifully. It draws the colour back into your eyes. Having said that, if you wanted to stick with the lighter shade, that’s okay.”
“I trust you.” Debra touched the fabric. It was impossibly soft. “This is…lovely.”
“Structured, but not severe.” Billie smiled. “Exactly the balance you deserve and the fabric I know for sure belongs on you.”
The compliment was gentle, landing somewhere deeper than it should have, but Debra was beginning to understand what this was. Billie was the kind of person who just knew how to touch you without laying a hand on you. Perhaps it was her personality, maybe it was how she made her living, but one thing was for sure: Debra knew what the boundary was now. Billie Brown wasn’t here for anything other than a service…unless it was on her terms.
They worked in near silence after that. Billie called out numbers to the assistant, now in the room and taking notes, and Debra nodded where she needed to. But her mind wasn’t on the suit. It was on the woman standing behind her, how close she felt even when she kept her distance, and how her eyes said more than any kind of affection ever could.
When the final measurement was done, Billie folded the tape neatly and stepped away. “We’ll have the first fitting ready by the end of next week. My assistant will contact you once it’s prepared.”
“Thank you.” Debra’s voice was soft, but it still didn’t break the tension she felt in the air. God, she thought she’d moved past the never-ending uncertainty in her life. “I’ll wait to hear from you.”
“Of course.” Billie nodded to her assistant, and she left the room. “I’m glad you came back, Ms Allen. I hope your appointments have reminded you of what’s still yours.”
Those words nearly broke her. Not only because it was Billie saying them, but because she was leaving this appointment feeling a little more fragile than she had during previous visits. A date not calling her back, she could deal with. A friend blowing her off, whatever. But Billie Brown and her icy front…no, thatwas more of a kick thananyoneturning her down. Still, she would lie and smile. “They did.”
“Good.” Billie’s smile bordered on painful. “That’s what we aim for here.”
And that was that. No further explanation. No warmth. Just a brief conversation between two people who couldn’t be any more different if they tried.
“Bye, Billie.”
Debra gathered her bag and forced herself not to look back as she walked out of the fitting room. When she stepped outside, the sound of the city hit her square in the face. Buses, footsteps, the rush of life continuing around her.
