“I don’t know how long she spent inside, but…”
Billie stared at her like she couldn’t quite comprehend it. Debra expected fear, panic, maybe even anger. But instead, Billie’s eyes filled with tears so suddenly that it startled Debra. Her throat worked, and then Billie scoffed once. “Oh, my God.”
“Are you okay?”
“She…” Billie swallowed, but her eyes brightened. “She actually?—”
“She was held accountable,” Debra finished gently.
Billie’s eyes darted downward, then back up again. And then her face crumpled enough for Debra’s heart to physically hurt. She watched on as Billie pressed a hand over her mouth, trying to contain a sob, tears falling freely down her face.
“Oh, sweetheart,” Debra whispered. “I’m sorry. I should have done this back at home.”
“S-she finally got caught?”
Debra’s own eyes stung as she watched Billie taking it all in.
“I finally feel like I’m not crazy anymore.”
“You were never crazy,” Debra whispered. “You were hurt.”
Billie swallowed, then gave Debra the smallest, most honest smile she’d ever witnessed. “God, I really am all in with you.”
Debra laughed around the lump in her throat. “Yes, I gathered.”
“I hate that someone else went through what I did, but I’m glad she went away for it.” Billie lifted a hand and called for the bill. “I feel like I can finally live my life. I feel…I feel free.”
“And you’ll always feel that way, baby.”
Billie wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and exhaled a deep breath. “Thank you for doing that for me.”
“Always, Billie.”
Billie stoodat Debra’s kitchen island with her palms braced against the counter, trying to keep herself upright. Debra had taken herself off to the bathroom a few minutes ago, but Billie knew what was happening here. She was giving her space to work through the latest on Janet alone. Billie appreciated that more than Debra likely knew or understood.
She just…wasn’t sure what to do with herself now. She wasn’t restless, her body felt calm, but her mind…her mind was still sitting at that table earlier, the words repeating on a loop she couldn’t quite trust yet.
Janet…had been to prison.
It hadn’t made sense at first. It sat wrong in her head, like a story that belonged to someone else. Because Janet wasn’t supposed to face consequences. Janet was supposed to float through life, leaving wreckage behind her, untouchable and unchallenged, protected by charm and excuses and the simple fact that people didn’t want to look at monsters too closely.
Billie had spent so many years believing that. She’d spent years believing thatshedeserved punishment. She’d spent years picking through her own memories like splinters of broken glass, asking herself ridiculous questions.
What if I hadn’t said that? What if I hadn’t pushed? What if I’d been quieter? What if I’d just listened better, anticipated her better, known what she wanted before she even asked for it?
Because that’s what she’d been trained to do.Trained, like an animal that learned which movements reduced the pain. The kneeling hadn’t been a choice; it hadn’t been something erotic or playful or controlled the way it later became when Billie chose to reclaim it. It had been survival and bruised bones. It had been desperation, and fear, and a body that had realised stillness was sometimes the only shield it had left.
Billie swallowed and stared down at the faint reflection of herself in the polished surface of the island. She could still picture it now. The way Janet would look at her when she was angry. With that calm cruelty that told Billie shewas the problem and shewouldmake it right.
Kneel.
Apologise.
Beg properly.
And Billie had. Not because she’d wanted to, but because she’d been taught that pain could be bargained with. It was only now—in Debra’s kitchen and in Debra’s life, surrounded by a love that didn’t askanythingof her—that Billie could see the truth without flinching away from it.
It had never been her fault. Not the whipping and not the bruises. Not the drinking and not the violence that didn’t even pretend to be about dominance in the end. She’d always wondered if she’d brought it on herself. Whether she’d misunderstood or if it was her own fault because she’d stayed toolong. Whether the moment she’d fallen in love, she’d somehow become unbearable or too needy.
