“No, you don’t.”
“Fine. No, I don’t. Now tell me your thing.”
What am I supposed to tell her? That my ex showed up and it turns out she’s actually my crush’s wife and then that crush tied me up in front of a class full of strangers before giving me the fastest orgasm of my life with only his fingers? Fuck. I’m confusing myself.
“Hayes let me demo for him in his class… finally,” I tell her plainly.
“Dem, that’s fucking great!” she exclaims, but I can’t find it in me to match her excitement. “Wait… isn’t it? It’s all you’ve been talking about. Why don’t you look happy about it?”
If that was all that happened, I’d probably be more enthusiastic, but life has a way of fucking with me and this has to be the universe’s way of telling me I’m supposed to be single and miserable.
“Raegan showed up just before the class.”
Her eyebrows lift in surprise. “We are talking about the same person, yeah? The therapist you had the lady boner for and then propositioned to be her submissive and then you fell in love with her and ended up girlfriends… until she shattered your heart into a million little pieces? That Raegan?”
“Jesus, CeCe. You really make it sound salacious and dirty. It really wasn’t. She quit as my therapist before we did anything. And yes, we’re talking about the same woman.”
“Okay,” she sighs, then moves to the fridge to pour herself some OJ. “Whatever helps you sleep at night. What is she even doing here?”
She’s really going to flip her lid at the next part.
“She’s married to Hayes.”
The fridge door slams shut and she slowly turns to face me, confusion written all over her face. “What was that?” she squeaks.
“You heard me.”
“Demmmmm,” she mutters quietly like we’re sharing a secret no one else in the world can hear. “What the actual fuck is going on?”
I wish I fucking knew. “I didn’t have time to talk to Hayes about it before our class and then he was gone by the time I had washed up. They supposedly haven’t seen each other for a long time and she flew in to sign divorce papers.”
Her hands fly up to meet her mouth, the shock of it all setting in.
I do need to talk to Hayes, but more so to make sure he understands I’m not going to stand in his way, no matter what happens. I fully support any decision he makes. They may think they’re getting divorced but I happen to know they both still have feelings for one another. Hell, he fucked me to try to get over her, although I guess we both kind of did that. And she broke up with me because she’s not over him. She didn’t say those exact words, but they also didn’t look at each other last night with hate in their eyes.
“Are you okay?” CeCe asks cautiously.
I give my shoulders a slight shrug. “I think I have to be. They’re married… to each other and I’d be a real bitch-and-a-half if I came between them. Plus, neither of them are actually mine to claim. They never really were.”
“What if theyactuallyget divorced?”
What if?
“I don’t know. If one or both of them were in a place to want me or want me back, how would I ever choose?” I clear my throat as tears sting against the backs of my eyelids. The thought of losing either one completely is not a pleasant one.
“Eeny, meeny, miney, mo?” she sing-songs, tapping her index finger against her chin, deep in thought. “Oooo, what about an orgasm contest? That could be interesting.”
“An orgasm contest could work,” I laugh. “For all the extra time Raegan had, Hayes has certainly made up for it in the quality department.”
“I knew it! I knew you rode the Hayes train again. Fucking called it.” We both break out into a fit of laughter. My best friend, ladies and gentleman. She’s crazy. Once we both come down, she places her arm around my shoulders and validates me like only she can. “Orgasms aside, it sounds like you had a weird, fucked up night. I’m sorry, babe. If I were in your shoes, I’d probably be just as messed up about it. It’s a shame you can’t just have both.”
“I’ve gotta put some real clothes on and do some things. Go take a bath or something and relax.” She plants a kiss on my cheek and proceeds to skip through the apartment until she’s out of sight.
Her words stick in my brain like glue. Both of them? There’s no way that would ever work, but I can’t say I hate the idea. I’m in no way over what Raegan did to me and how she ended things, but I’m stupidly also not over her. The thought of being touched by both of them at the same time sends a shiver down my spine in the most delicious way.
My phone pings twice from my purse on the other side of the counter, signaling incoming texts. I pull my phone out and see the first is from my dad. Pass. The second is from Hayes.
HAYES:Just checking in after last night. Are you okay?
