I shuffle awkwardly towards the foot of the bed, trying to slide out from under what’s-his-name’s arm, and end up getting stuck when his arm lodges itself inconveniently under my chin. Great. I take a moment to develop at least a semi-solid game plan out of pure fear I’ll wake sleeping beauty.Maybe rolling would do the trick.My mouth opens wide in a fake yawn, as I act like I’m just casually changing positions, because for some reason, it makessense in my hungover brain that he’ll notice the movement less than if I just got up. When he shifts, I feel the distinct jab of something hard in my side. Fuck, he’s hard. What a waste of a perfectly huge dick.
Nope.
That’s my fucking cue because I’m all out of tickets for that ride. With renewed purpose, I make quick work of getting out from under him, landing back on my feet.
Bathroom. I need the bathroom.
It’s nothing personal Chad. It’s you, not me. Wait, that’s supposed to be the other way around. I chuckle to myself, because I’m pretty sure I was right the first time. It’s him. My eyes roll at the reminder of him askingmeto tiehimup. I’m a people pleaser by nature, so I considered it for 4.2 seconds before settling on playing dumb and telling him, “I don’t know how to do that.” I’ve had worse sex, but as usual, I was left in the dust on the way to the finish line. Whatever, that’s what vibrators are for.
As soon as I’m done emptying my bladder, I quickly gather my things and make the dreaded walk of shame to my car. My phone vibrates again just as I close the door, and I release a long breath. I can’t believe I made it out without waking him up. See you never, Brad.
When my phone rings yet again, I look to see my best friend Wrinley’s face lighting up the screen. I press answer quickly while I shuffle down the hall in my bare feet.
“What’s up, bitch?”
“Good morning to you too, whore,” she retorts.
Wrinley and I have been best friends since the seventh grade and I don’t know what I’d do without her. Unlike me, she grew up with two parents that were loving, kind and worshiped the ground she walked on. Their home was my escape when I needed a break. Our freshman year of high school, her momtragically passed away. Her father was understandably guarded when it came to his daughter after that. He held on tight as long as he could, but she essentially lost her shit when she turned eighteen. She smoked her first cigarette because she could and to this day, does what she can to rebel and push his buttons. She would never admit it, but her parents did unwillingly instill some of their beliefs in her. She’s a good girl to her core, dressed in a wild child package. I know her secrets though. She can’t hide them from me.
“I’m sorry Wrin. What can I do for you on this lovely morning whilst I journey back to my vehicle post tryst?” I ask in my most ridiculous fake British accent.
“You’re hilarious. Who is he? Will you be seeing him again? I need to know all the sordid details so I can live vicariously through you!” I can picture her pout from here.
“Jesus. No. I willnotbe seeing him again.” A couple years ago, I slept with a guy that spanked my ass so hard, while fucking me from behind, I saw stars and came instantaneously. I’ve been chasing that particular high ever since. I would have kept seeing him, but I don’t do repeats. Generally speaking, dating leads to engagements, which leads to marriage and then families. Thanks, but no thanks. “Don’t be jealous Wrin. It’s not a good look on you. Besides, there’s nothing to be jealous about. His dick was impressive, but he didn’t know what to do with it and he practically begged me to tie him up. Hard pass.”
“Tying someone up might be fun. You don’t know til you try. Speaking of trying, have you talked to your brother lately? Is he coming home anytime soon?” Insert awkward pause here, because what the fuck??
“I don’t know. Why do you care?”
“I don’t care. Just curious. Can we talk about why I really called now?” she pleads.
“Whydidyou call? You never told me.”
“Just hear me out, okay?”
Oh fuck, here we go.
“I have a date this weekend and I want you to double with me. He has a friend and I don’t want to go alone. He wants to take me to this kink club and I’ve never had the chance to do something like this before and this seems right up your alley and I would really be grateful if you would please come… for me.” I don’t think she used any punctuation in that request and it’s not lost on me that she tried to whisper “kink club” in effort to sneak it past me.
“Oh my god. What in the ever-loving fuck makes you think I have experience with kink clubs?” I question with a half chuckle.
“Okay, so maybe you haven’t been to a kink club, but you are a hell of a lot more experienced in all things sex and kink than I am. You can’t even deny it.” I’m not sure if I should feel proud or insulted at her insinuation.
With a deep sigh I prepare to disappoint her like I usually do lately. “I can’t. Mom asked me to come by this weekend and help her with the house. I also have to work and go grocery shopping. I haven’t been in two weeks and I have nothing left to salvage into anything even resembling a meal. There is too much to do and not enough time to do it.”
My life, these days, is an endless loop of working, helping mom and doing the bare minimum to function and keep my life together… with a sprinkle of sexy fun time, when I can squeeze it in. Lather, rinse, repeat. Even when I do have time, I’m usually too tired to do anything about it and end up doom scrolling on my phone for hours on end.
“It’s just one night. I happen to know you don’t work Saturday night.”
”You’re right, I don’t work Saturday, but I do tonight, tomorrow night and Friday night. I have a whole day off onSaturday, but there is so much I have to squeeze in on my days off. It’s insane.”
“I get it, but you never take time for yourself. You are always giving and doing for other people, especially your Mom. What happened to setting boundaries with her? She’s a grown ass woman, she can take care of herself.Youarenother parent.”
My cheeks burn at her assessment, because she’s right. I have been promising I’d set boundaries with my mom for years and I still can’t seem to do it. I always start with the best of intentions but as soon as I’m in front of her, I can’t do it. Most people see me as strong, independent with a “take shit from no one” attitude, because that’s what I want them to see. With mom, my metaphorical balls just shrivel up and die a quick and painful death.
Unfortunately for me, Wrinley knows me better than the face I put on for the rest of the world. She often knows me better than I know myself.
“Canshe take care of herself? Because it doesn’t seem like it. When I don’t help her, everything goes to shit. Last time I blew her off, she fell and hit her head and the guilt eats at me. Now, between the headaches and memory issues that caused, if I don’t label all her med bottles with the times she needs to take them, she’ll forget. Shecan’tforget. She has important meds that she can’t skip. If she does, she could end up in one of her depressive spirals, which will be my fault. And setting boundaries is not as easy as you think. It’s like she knows exactly what to say to get me to do her bidding and has no remorse while doing it. At the end of the day, she’s still my Mom. If I don’t help her, who will? She’s been single for the last six years and Axel ran off to do god knows what. That leaves me. I’m all she has.”
