"Let you in on a little secret," I tell her, putting my lips to her ear; she shivers as I whisper, and her fingernails curl and dig into my chest."I'm a mess too, Morgan."
“You are?"she breathes.
"Hell yes," I answer."This is new and scary for me, too.I don't know what I'm doing.My feelings are all over the place."
She rests her cheek on my chest, and I follow her gaze across the room to the mantle, to the framed photos of my family…of Taylor."Is it…is it too hard, being here?"A pause, a loud gulp."With…with me, I mean."
"Maybe."I let out a heavy sigh."Maybe it is.I dunno.Like I said, this is all new to me."
"You're welcome to come over to my place sometime, but I can't guarantee what kind of privacy we'd have."She tips her head to one side."Depending on what time of day we were there, at least."
I brush her wild, thick, unruly black hair away from her face.Let my hands roam down to her hips, pausing at the swell and then find flesh, palm her waist between breasts and hips."I'm not in a hurry, Morgan.I want you, but I want us to be ready and to be comfortable.No panic.No fear.I'm content to be with you just like this.Here, your place, wherever."I nuzzle her lips with mine."I'm not an impatient twenty-two-year-old, Morgan.I know how to wait for the good stuff.I know how to wait for when it's right."
"God, Noah.You're too good to be real."
"I'm really not.I'm trying to…" I shake my head, shrug."I want you to feel not just wanted but respected.Whatever I feel for you, which is a lot and intense, it's…it's not—"
Her fingers touch my lips, silencing me as I stumble blindly for the right way to say what I’m thinking."Noah."Her lips replace her fingers."Coffee."
I break away, laughing."I like a woman who has her priorities straight."I straighten, and she goes with me.
"Well, coffee is priority number one for me."She pushes me back against the counter."Can I get it for us?"
I shrug, gesture at the cabinet above the coffeemaker."Go for it.Cream's in the fridge."
A minute or so later, we've both got steaming mugs of precious coffee, and we're standing awkwardly in the kitchen, holding the mugs and staring at each other, uncertain how to proceed.
“This is silly,” I grumble."C'mon.Let’s sit."
I go to the couch and take a seat in my favorite spot—in the left corner, nearest the fireplace; Morgan settles in right up next to me, hip to hip, thigh to thigh, cozy and familiar and comfortable.I lift and wiggle the remote."You a news in the morning person?"
She shakes her head."Not a fan of waking up and being depressed all day, so no."
I snort as I bring the mug to my lips."Same."
As we sip, Morgan repeatedly brings her phone to her face, unlocks it, pauses, re-locks it, and sets it back down.Eventually she fakes hurling it across the room."Trying not to phub you, but the damn thing keeps appearing in my hand."
"Phub?"I ask.
"Yeah, you know.Ignoring the person you're with in favor of your phone.I think it's a combination of phone and snub…phub."
“Haven't heard that before," I say, grabbing my phone from the end table."But I see nothing wrong with sipping and checking emails together, right?"
She exhales in relief."Thank god.I'm programmed to look at my phone while drinking coffee, I think.Sad, I know."
I shrug."Not sad, just normal."
It’s surprisingly easy just to sit, drink coffee, and do phone things together.We finish our coffee, refill, set our phones aside, and just…talk.The kind of conversation that flows easily from one thing to another and you couldn't say what you'd been talking about five minutes earlier because it's just…easy.Natural.
Finally, Morgan sets her mug aside and turns on the couch to face me, her knees together and resting on my thigh."I wanted to say thank you…again."
"For?"
She rolls her eyes with a slight head shake."Taking care of me…again.When I panicked, you didn't…you just took care of me.You didn't make me feel bad for basically cock-blocking you."
I snort again."Morgan.You didn't cock-block me.Good grief, woman.What kind of man would I be if you had a goddamned panic attack like that and all I cared about was that I had to stop?"
"A man like my ex-husband," she murmurs.
