“Of course.” His smile faded, and he returned to his entrée.
As the meal continued, I was hyper-aware of every little thing—the way his fingers drummed nervously on the table, how his shoulders became tight when talk turned back to the resort. But then he’d look at me, really look at me, with such warmth and attention that my doubts would momentarily fade. Only to rush back when he’d zone out again.
When the check arrived, Eli said, “Hey, what do you say we grab a nightcap at my place? I’ve got a bottle of rum with your name on it.”
My heart skipped. “Sounds perfect.”
As we left Rousseau’s, Eli’s hand found the small of my back, guiding me through the door. The familiar gesture soothed me, and I leaned into his touch.
The moonlight cast long shadows across Eli’s bungalow as we stepped inside. The faded lavender exterior gave way to a cozy interior, all weathered wood and nautical touches. I kicked off my heels, wiggling my toes against the cool hardwood floor.
“Make yourself comfortable,” Eli called, heading for the kitchen. “I’ll grab that rum.”
I sank onto his well-worn but extremely comfortable couch. The sound of clinking glasses drifted from the kitchen, punctuated by Eli’s absent-minded humming. And my mind returned to the distance, and the fact that I’d been too damned afraid to ask him about it directly at dinner.
Stop being a chickenshit!
He appeared in the doorway, two glasses in hand, a quarter full of ice and amber liquid. “Bottoms up. This is a spiced blend I get from a guy in Key West.”
He sat next to me, and after clinking our glasses together, I lifted mine to my mouth. The spicy, almost sweet taste filled my senses, with a fiery satisfaction after I swallowed.
Verne, you’re stalling…
I took a deep breath. “Can we talk about what happened at the end of the meeting yesterday?”
Eli’s easy smile faltered. “What do you mean?”
“You got distant. Like you were a million miles away.” I swallowed hard, hating how quiet and unsure I sounded. “And I noticed it again tonight. I just, I need to know where we stand. Is this about me?”
He brushed his knuckles down my cheek. “Jules, you have nothing to worry about. What we have is important to me.”
I leaned into his touch, relief washing over me. “Then what’s going on? I can tell that whatever’s bothering you still is.”
He sighed, his shoulders sagging slightly as he relaxed against the back of the couch. “It’s the resort. Chase’s proposals, the financial strain… it’s all just hitting me, you know?”
“Eli,” I said, my voice soft but determined. “I know there’s more to it than just the resort.”
A ghost of a smile flickered across his face. He ran a hand through his hair, a telltale sign of his discomfort. “Okay, you got me. This thing between us is pretty complicated. I vowed after my parents broke up never to repeat their mistakes. And you and I are getting closer… but I have to wonder if a long-term thing just isn’t in my DNA.”
I wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Because I didn’t want serious either. Did I? I opened my mouth, but he cut me off with a self-deprecating laugh.
“I should come with a built-in warning label, right?Caution: Contents May Be Emotionally Unstable.”
I sighed, slightly irritated. But the joking was who Eli was, though I was coming to believe his humor was more of a suit of armor than a personality quirk. Part of me wanted to push a little harder, to make him confront his fears. But I could see the vulnerability in his eyes, the way his jaw clenched. Pushing could be the worst possible thing I could do.
“You are not either of your parents,” I said instead, resting my palm flat on his chest. “And for what it’s worth, I think you’re doing just fine in the relationship department.”
I felt more than heard his soft laugh. “High praise from the resort’s resident number-cruncher. And emotional avoiderpar excellence. Should I expect a performance review?”
“Quarterly evaluations at minimum,” I deadpanned, then softened. “But seriously, Eli. I trust you. We’ll figure this out together, okay?”
He pulled me closer and pressed a kiss to the top of my head. “Together,” he echoed. “I like the sound of that.”
As we stood there, wrapped in each other’s arms, I pushed away the lingering doubts. Eli wasn’t perfect, but neither was I. And after everything with my ex, the fact that I could trust anyone again felt like a small miracle. And for now, this moment, imperfect as it might be, was enough.
Eli leaned in, softly brushing the back of his hand down my cheek. Then his lips met mine in a tender but thorough kiss. Desire bloomed in my chest, even as a nagging voice in my head warned me this could be a distraction tactic. I pushed the thought away, surrenderingto the warmth of his lips. My fingers brushed his broad shoulders as I pulled him closer, tasting the faint hint of salt on his skin.
“You’re so smart, so sexy,” he murmured against my lips, his voice husky. “You mean a lot to me. You know that?”
